Expert: Michael Troy - 12/3/2006

Question
Hello, I would like some help with a situation between two friends of mine (honestly, it's not me).

The girl is 15 and the boy is 20. They have been seeing each other for a few months now. This is a non-sexual relationship. They do kiss and touch, much like any other relationship, but I can't vouch for the sexuality or non-sexuality of the touching.

Her parents approve of him, and they are both good people. No drinking, no drugs, no sex. He's a model student.

The problem though is her uncle. She recently told him that the two of them were in a relationship and he said that he'd call the cops on them if they don't break up. None of us know what to do.

What I'm wondering is if my friend can actually get arrested, and how much say the uncle would have against the girls parents and friends.

There were similar questions asked already on this subject, with some of them in regards to non-sexual relationships to which you said that they probably shouldn't worry if there is no sex going on and they're just dating. I'm just wondering if he can call the cops on my friend and actually get him in trouble.

Answer
Well first off, you can always call the cops on someone and get them in trouble, even if there is not necessarily enough to convict.

The exact laws vary from state to state, but in most States, it depends on what you mean by "touching."  Kissing and holding hands would probably be ok.  Groping breasts or private areas would probably be considered sexual assualt on a minor (even if she is a voluntary participant).  In a few states, even kissing may be trouble.  It really depends on the statutory language in the relevant State.

In my personal view, such a relationship can be very dangerous.  Even if nothing is going on now, there is always a major temptation to take the relationship farther.  I'd recommend they see other people for a few years until the girl is older.  

But that said, as long as they do not engage in any sexual touching, no crime is committed just by seeing each other.

I hope this helps!
- Mike