Expert: Diane Cheryl - 5/6/2009

Question
I am 19 years old and am 10 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend family and boyfriend are not understanding to the fact that I want an abortion. I have been physically sick and unable to function and this is interfering with school. I am positive that I am getting an abortion but will need to tell my boyfriends family that I have miscarried. Just very confused and scared.

Answer
Dear Gehan,

Thanks for your question. I would discourage you from having an abortion. I have counseled women for 20 years with unplanned pregnancy situations and abortion. Most women I have talked to who had an abortion are very sad and regret their decision. Abortion can cause physical problems as well as mental, psychological and spiritual. Women have also died from an abortion procedure. I would not want you to suffer any of the post abortion symptoms. Also, I can't remember the percentage but it is highly likely that your relationship with your boyfriend will suffer and perhaps end forever.

If you are suffering from physical problems from your pregnancy, we can try to find some relief and ideas to help with this. Many women are going to school while pregnant and if you have relief from the sick feeling, this could help you. Are there any other reasons why you would want an abortion? If you tell your boyfriend or his family that you miscarry, this could result in guilt and lack of trust.

Please join the yahoo group for unplanned Pregnancy, http://groups.yahoo.com/group/unplanned_pregnancy_help/
Also, I'm not sure where you live but contact a pregnancy center for help and support. Look one up at http://www.optionline.org or if you don't live in a country that has a center listed on that site, try
http://www.heartbeatinternational.org/worldwide_directory.asp

I am going to give you my private email so we can talk more. Please email me at CHERYL51@aol.com and put ALLEXPERTS in the subject line.
I hope I hear from you soon.

Sincerely,
Diane Cheryl