Abortion/!

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QUESTION: I had an abortion 2 weeks ago but aweek after my abortion I had sex with my bf unprotected he did nt ejaculate and it was only for a short while the next day I took the morning afta pill. I'm jus realy wurried now. And I'm feelin realy sick all the time I don't knw if its wurri or what. Wha are my chances of being pregnant aweek after my abortion and takin the morning afta pill?

ANSWER: Hello.

You are unlikely to have been fertile only a week after your abortion. However, if your boyfriend enters your body or leaves a drop anywhere just outside your body, pregnancy is possible. Pulling out doesn't work. The morning after pill is a toxic medication, and you took it without even knowing if you "needed" it or not. This is not wise. As for your chances, you will have to wait and see. It would be hard to tell you when to start testing, because you haven't had an established period yet, so that you can know when you should have a period. However, it is still unlikely simply because it was so soon.

The fact is, as long as you continue to have sex, you will live in fear of abortion. Protection doesn't work. Most methods of contraception have a significant failure rate when the couple is not married. Regardless of whether you manage to avoid pregnancy or not, there is still the danger of sexually transmitted disease, and contrary to popular opinion, condoms don't help prevent that. You are at risk if your boyfriend has ever slept with anyone else, whether he has told you or not. Abortion also increases the risk, because it harms a woman's immune system. You deserve better. You deserve a man who will respect your body and your integrity, who will protect you from abortion. Exploiting your body for his personal pleasure is not love. Have a talk with him. See if he will start to respect your body. If he won't, you would be better off finding someone else. Please take care of yourself. Abortion is dangerous and can kill you or leave you seriously disabled. It can also harm your future children. Let me know how you do. Stay safe!


---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: I'm sorry it was 9 days not 7 I've jus worked it out! I'm feeling realy sick all the time

ANSWER: Hello.

It's OK. Either one is about the same difference.

If you are experiencing morning sickness, the best remedy is to sip ginger tea or ginger ale (with real sugar). The tea is better if you can get it. When you are able to eat, get protein (if you are a vegetarian, try to eat some cheese or eggs), and take vitamins.

Whatever you do, please don't take any pills or get another abortion. You will be much worse off medically if you do. These are all really dangerous. They can kill you or cause you to become seriously disabled. It can cause you to get breast cancer before you are 40. The death rate from this form of cancer is one out of four. It can cause you to develop an auto-immune disease such as lupus or rheumatoid arthritis. It can kill your future children, or cause them to develop serious birth defects. You deserve better.

Obviously, since you already had an abortion, you are at risk for some of these things. We can talk about ways to help you with those problems if you want. Let me know.

There are organizations in UK that can help you with whatever you are facing that makes being pregnant seem like a horrible fate. You can find one near you by going here:

http://www.optionline.org/

Please take care of yourself and keep yourself safe. Keep in touch and let me know how you are doing.

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: Okay thank u for ur advice.
No I won't be taking any more morning after pills and deffinatly won't be having another abortion. I already have a 3years and reason being was I'd got court while was on the pill and me and my bf both decided and agreed it was the best choice for us as a family and the unborn child tha finacialy and living we couldn't have ior bring up a child. But nothing compares to the regret afterwards I would never recommand an abortion or anythn to anyone.
It has emotional effects that noone can ever prepare u for.
We are now working harder at our jobs to secure us and eventualy have another baby becuase after an abortion u carnt explaine the missing piece .
Thank u for understanding.  X

Answer
Hello.

You're welcome. So many times the situations women are in break my heart, and that's why I am here.

Thanks for the update! I know what you mean about the regret. I know a good many women have healed emotionally and spiritually from abortion, but I sure don't have any idea how they manage it. Some women actually try to replace the baby by becoming pregnant again as soon as possible. I wish you all the best. The link I gave you will lead to an organization that can provide counseling and other services to help with emotional and spiritual healing. Hopefully, you two will get married and make a solid home because that is best for a child, and it also means saving a lot of expenses, so it just makes sense if you two truly love each other and would work well together.

Take care.

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Pat G

Expertise

I can help women with the consideration of their decision, and with resources, and I can share my own experiences as the mother of seven and grandmother of eleven. My approach is to show love and concern, and help women work through the issues, emotional, spiritual, practical. I also help women deal with boyfriend and family issues. I am not a doctor, but I have done extensive medical research, so I may be able to help with information. I am female. When you write, if you are or were pregnant, please tell me how far along you were or are, and if you have had an abortion, please tell me what kind. Thank you.

Experience

I have been working with women who are considering abortion for several years. I also work with women who have had abortions. Our family has also experienced adoption, so I can talk about that as well.

Education/Credentials
I am mostly self-taught. I also studied midwifery for awhile. I have spent years doing research on this topic. In fact, I have been doing research and working in this area since the early 1970's. I have been helping women online for a few years, under the guidance of a woman who was formally training in counseling.

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