About Francis Hosein Expertise I can answer questions on relationships; marriage, abuse, controlling relationships, successful relationships, codependency, father and daughter relationships,
I can answer questions on psychics, mediums, paranormal phenomena.
Experience relationships, psychic readings, setting goals, meditation, tai chi, therapy, yoga, massage. neuro linguistic programming
Education/Credentials b.a. in psychology, therapist in NLP, degree in chi nei tsang massage.
medium for over twenty years. Tai chi teacher for 27 years.
I am the brother of someone being abused and I don't know how to help her.
My sister has been dating a man for over a year who lives with her and her three children. This man was a nice guy. I met him before he and my sister started dating and I actually encouraged her to call him over and go on dates with him. It wasn't until a few months into their relationship that I noticed he was getting angrier over little things. He would freak out about my sister not being home when he came by, or when she didn't pick up the phone when he called. I ended up moving out because of differences between the boyfriend and myself. She knew that I didn't like him, and we tried to get her to realize this but she could not see it.
Over the last year that he has lived with my sister, he has pinned her down on the ground in front of her children. Threw her off the bed, and puts her down in public. He doesn't help her financially so she is basically providing for herself and her three children. He also embarrasses her in front of co-workers by pulling a rage in front of them. I am sure there are more incidents but these are a few I know of.
I have moved back with my sister to help her emotionally and financially and today I saw one of his episodes. He hit the wall hard knocking off photos and being the brother I naturally put myself in between the two. A lot of yelling occurred and she ended up crying for over an hour.
I know she is in an abusive relationship, but it is hard because at the end of it all they act normal. I don't know how to help her. Violence against him is not the answer and telling my sister his faults doesn't seem to be working either. I am worried for her and the children. Her oldest son (10) sleeps with a bat because he wants to be ready in case something happens. Her oldest daughter (14) already wanted to leave the house when he freaked out on them when my sister was at work. (They called her frantic because he was screaming and slamming things over noise in the house)
I know this is long but I wanted to give you a little background. As intelligent as I claim to be, I am not sure how to help her. It emotionally hurts me to see her this way, along with her kids. Can you help?
Trent
Answer Hi Trent, it is not easy to see a family member getting hurt and feel like your hands are tied.
For this is what is happening until your sister is willing to see that it is hurting the kids emotionally and that she is showing a bad example for her kids she will not do anything.
Is the apartment or house you are staying, in your sister's name if yes you cannot throw him out.
Your sister is afraid of being alone again, she may feel having one man is better than no man.
She may have hope that she can change him.
You can help her and that means that you can get information that can help her to get some counseling.
Go to the police and get some suggestion or call a government agency that specialize in abusive family relationship, they may help her because her kids are in danger.
If your sister gives you permission you can ask the person to leave.
See if you can follow through with some of these ideas.
Lastly reassure your sister that you are here to support her and that she does not have to do this by herself. God Bless.
