Expert: David Simonsen - 12/28/2008

Question
Hi my name is Sylvia. I am 38, my boyfriend of five months is 35. He can be such a good boyfriend a lot of the time. And then other times, not so much. I don't know what to do. My sister thinks he's being mentally abusive. I'm confused.
Heres why..if I am worried about something, anything he gets angry and tells me to quit worrying so much (like will I have enough money for a cab to work? etc). I don't do it often but he throws in his comment like 'I hate people who worry about things like you do!!' and then he gets angry with me..if I upset him at all he yells and then drops me off at home and takes off to his house and won't talk to me.
He told me we would spend New years even together, and he's made other plans to visit friends out of town..when I asked him why he's doing that, he got very angry with me and pretty much told me to deal with it.
Pretty much if anything at all bugs me, he yells and tells me to deal with it.
I don't know if I can handle this anymore. I don't get what happened, he was chasing me for a year (we work together) and he did anything and everything for me. Now it seems he's changed. And I get upset, I can't eat, I have a hard time sleeping and I'm sick of running to him everytime trying to make things right.
I'm so confused..is my sister right??


Answer
Sylivia,
Dating is about gathering information, not about being desperate. It sounds like you have enough information to let you know that this is not a good relationship. It is difficult because you are wrapped up in the emotion of it. Start thinking rationally.
David
www.help4life.net