Expert: David Simonsen - 12/27/2008

Question
I am a 22year old female who recently lived with my uncle for about 2 years. I wasnt desperately in need of a place to stay but the thought of my own room seemed better than sleeping on my dad's couch. He respectably offered me a place to stay rent free if i would keep the place clean.Afetr about a year he would be angry ay things that didnt make him mad before and vise-versa. I consider myself a strong individual and have ALWAYS been that way. I was able to deal with his psychotic episodes until one night he touched me in a way that made me uncomfortable; infront of his friend. I was really scared but I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt; You know maybe he accidently/didnt mean to etc. I stayed away from the house w/my mother in another city- he would call me and demand that I come home right now to clean his house. Besides that he kept making me feel really uncomfortable when i did see him. I told my dad(uncle's brother) who i trust or trusted with all my heart about that. Suprisingly he was stunned. he didnt think my uncle's intentions were what i thought but he said he would try and see what was going on. I was touched again by my uncle at a family function at grandmas in the living room.My uncle knew i was not speaking to him and when just about every adult was outside on the porch or in the kitchen (it was July)he crept over and did it again while  apologizing for his temper, my little brother saw, hes 18 and the one person i am very close to. At first he thought i was overreacting   too until he saw that happend. I told my dad of the second incident and he blew up on me and said im overreacting and if i have a problem with my uncle i should talk to him myself. I finally told my grandma and grandpa who immediately denied any of it(im overreacting again)while they have never whitnessed his behavior b/c he doesnt act that way around them. I want to know if what i am experiencing is actually abuse and if it is how do i go about not holding a grudge against my dad and grandparents. Is there anything i can do understand why they wont accept what im telling them? I am also concerned b/c I have 3 younger sisters 7, 14, and 16 while i dont want to put things in their heads (they are young)i need to protect them if nobody else will. Is this really an abusive realtionship? Im sorry this is so long i cant find hlp anywhere...Thank You so much for your time

Answer
Tara,
Unless you specifically say what he did I can't really now if it was abuse. You could talk to a police officer and see what they think. I would suggest you do that if you are worried for the safety of your siblings. Otherwise, find another place to live. Living with your uncle does not sound fun.
David
www.help4life.net