AboutAzure Expertise can answer all relationship questions involving unhealthy, addictive, or otherwise unhappy arrangements, except those involving the legalities of physical abuse..
Experience see bio under "general dating questions"
Expert: Azure Date: 4/22/2008 Subject: Should I go back?
Question I recently ended a three year verbally abusive relationship. My ex had a very physically abusive childhood so every time he'd get mad and blam it on that I just said ok he can't help it. I tried countless times over the last 3 years to get him help and he never wanted to go.
a Few months ago he lost his juob and everything go worse, everything i did was wrong and if i even went to work he accused me of cheating. This last weekend he spit on me and called me a whore and I broke. That night I kicked him out he became suicidal and the police had to be called. Now he is at his sisters house and keeps calling saying how can I do this, if I loved him I would help him get better adn that I'm a cold hearted Bitch for not helping someone in need. Should I go back to help him like I feel I'm obligated to, or do i finally fight for the life I want?
I should also mention I had a annorexia when we had first met and he had helped me through that now I feel I have to return the favour, even though I don't know if I can love him the same again.
I'm sorry I'm so confused
Answer it's over--goin back won't really help him, and will be the end of you; it will only service his dependency on you, which he needs to break; sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind--neither of you is good for the other, nor emotionally ready to be with anyone; he needs to get counseling, get his act together, you need to refocus on YOUR life...
