About Alina Neal Expertise I can answer any questions concerning abuse whether it be physical, emotional and or sexual. I have been a counselor and a nurse in my life time and have lived and fought my way to being safe in all aspects.
Experience I have experienced every form of abuse and have lived through it, and come out of it stronger emotionally and physically.
Publications www.Helium.com
Education/Credentials Social work/psychology Human Relations/Counseling
Question I have been married for 22 years, we have been separated for approx.3 years on and off. He has been very controlling over the years and I have since learned that he has bi polar. He makes me feel guilty and when I am away from him I want to be with him but when he is around I feel all the things he has done to me. I have not been the easiest person either at times as I have probably wanted things to go my way too. I want to love him but I dont know how as I feel hurt
Answer Carolyn
Sounds like a vicious cycle. Bi polar are not the easiest people to live with. They will generally make you always feel like everything is your fault or what they did was because of something you did.
They seem to never take credit for their own problems. My advice is to leave, I think you know what your heart is telling you. Do not put yourself through hell. You have to love thy self first and by loving yourself first that means putting your feelings first and being true to you inner self. If this is not or has not been making you feel good then you need to leave and stay away from anyone that makes you feel badly like this.
Most bipolars who are not medicated or not in counseling end up having affairs, try to manipulate every situation and even become abuseful. Control, tempers, and making you feel guilty can take a toll on your self esteem and what not. I think you have done enough for this man. You should leave and find out what awaits you outside of this world. Also it may be a good idea to get yourself counseling so that you stay away from this type. Sometimes we attract a certain type because we want to help or we want to fix a person. Counseling will make you see that we are not the ones to fix others.
