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You are here: Experts > People/Relationships > Marriage > Abusive Relationships > please tell me im not craxy like he says
Expert: Alina Neal
Date: 5/19/2008
Subject: please tell me im not craxy like he says
Question
I HAVE BEEN MARRIED 10 YEARS. I HAD HIM ARESTED A FEW TIMES, WE OWENED A BUINESS A ALARM COMPANY, HE PUT IT IN MY NAME FOR MANY REASONS. WHEN I HAD HIM ARESTED THE SECOND TIME, HE WAS SO NICE ! TO NICE I DID EVERY THING IN COURT TO GET HIM BACK, HE IN RETURN STARTED TO SAY AND DO THINGS TO MAKE ME THINK I AM CRAZY PERANOID HAD PEOPLE DO THINGS . TO MAKE ALONG STORY SHORT HE WORKS IN SECURITY AND CAMERAS, HE SAYS THINGS I ONLY TOLD ON THE PHONE TO MY FRIEND, HE REPEATS THINGS NO ONE WOULD KNOW HE KEEPS SAYING I AM GETTING CUSTADY OF MY 12 YEAR OLD DAUGHTER, I DONT GO OUT ALL HIS FRIENDS LIVE NEXT DOOR, THEY TURN THEER HEADS AND SAY STUPID THING THAT RELATE TO ME IN A INDIRECT WAY MY BODY HURTS SO MUCH, MY MIND KEEPS GOING CAN SOME ONE MAKE YOU PARANOID I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY I AM AFRAID TO SAY , I LOST MY HOME FRIENDS.HE DOS ALL THESES THINGS MAKES ME SICK, I FEEL LIKE IM IN SHOCK , LOSS OF APPERANCE HOUSE WORK I PACE TILL I CANT PACE ANY MORE I CANT LIVE LIKE THIS ANY MORE I FEEL LIKE IM GONNA DIE FROM FEELING SO SICK ,EVRY DAY IS SO HARD NO JOB HOUSE IS GONE IN AMONTH CCREDIT I OWE SO MUCH BACK TAXES I NEVER SMLE OR LAUGH EVERY THING I THINK RELATES TO HIM WHAT HE DID OR SAID FLASHES ALL DAY, I KEEP SAYING THINGS TO HIM TO DEFEND MY SELF, HE KNOWS EVRY THING T SAY AND DO , TO GET ME UP SET I SMOKE SO MUCH COFFE STAY HOME , I KNOW I DID STUFF TO. BUT HE DID SAY PAY BACK IS A BITCH.I KEEP TALKING TO HIM WE LIVE IN TWO PLACES I LIVE IN DIS BELEAF I FEEL THERE IS NO WAY OUT,LIKE I LOST IT.I FEEL INVERTED. I WANT MY LIFE BACK, CAN SOME ONE PLEASE TALK TO ME. IM LOSING HOPE
Answer
Cathy
Get a restraining order. If they asked if he threatened you say "Yes" so that way it can go through. Also tell them about his spying on you. Get a loan or something then go bankrupt if you have to. Move away without telling anyone wearing you are going until you are safe and out of harm. If you cannot even afford to do this go to a womans shelter or stay with family and have their number changed. Everytime you see him or tries to come near call the police. His actions are not changing therefore yours will have to. Abusers will make you think your weak, they will make you feel so low that you are scared to leave. But you must or it will just keep getting worse and worse.
You need to focus on yourself that means get counseling, move away, build up your self esteem and start working out so that way you start feeling good from the inside out. You need to stop this vicious cycle.
Keep your chin up, I am here if you need anymore info
Alina
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