Abusive Relationships/help to recover

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Expert: Eugenia Springer, Ph.D. - 5/29/2009


Question
I left a 16 year abusive marriage<my ex whom i had aprotective order against spent ayear n jail for violating it>I then became involved with a man who beat me worse and my ex is out of jail .Now both r harrasing me .I was wondering how do i ever get out of the cycle,I feel still that i deserve the punishment>The boyfreind has teial coming up for 2 counts simple kidnapping assault etc. and he is leaving messages confusing me>I really dod not wont to go to court again,Embarrased, very lost and me and the kids do not have a home so everything is crazy.Please help

Answer
Lon,

Go right now to Social Services in your area, ask for protection.  It seems a shelter out of the reach of these men would be the ideal thing.  You would have to be careful to perhaps cut ties, for the time being, with people who might give these men information about your whereabouts.  Your children must be sensitized to the need to refrain from telling friends about their location.

But it seems you need more help than protection from these men.  You need to break loose from the cycle in which you find yourself.  Here, religion can help.  Find a church, talk to the leader, and let the congregation help you and your family.

I wait to hear from you.

Dr. ES

Abusive Relationships

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Eugenia Springer, Ph.D.

Expertise

I can answer your questions on how to stop being a victim, and/or how to stop being an abuser. My ability to help you, however, would depend on your willingness to assume full responsibility for helping yourself.

Experience

From the 1970s to the present, my life has been a search after knowing my purpose, knowing myself, and knowing God. I talk about this search in my 2002 book, "Further Insights Into the Journey". After years of teaching biology at university, I became a radio Family Life Counselor, and a newspaper columnist, responding to callers on radio, and replying to letters from the public, in the newspapers. My book for the adolescent girl, "Girl, It's All About You"(Review & Herald Publishers 1980, and out of print) was my attempt to marry my field of training--biology, and my adoptive field--interpersonal relationships. "Further Insights Into the Journey" is about my search for personal freedom--a search for freedom from external controls; for freedom from fear. Through very instructive experiences, many sorely trying, I uncovered that freedom within me, and found myself progressively experiencing increasingly greater measures of peace. To get your copy of "Further Insights Into The Journey" email me at dreugenia.springer@live.com For a few years I hosted and produced the weekly call-in radio program, Life and Living/Soul to Soul on radio station Power102fm.

Education/Credentials
Certificate in Parenting and Family Life Counseling Certificate in Dianetics Counseling Ph.D. in Zoology (specializing in Biochemical Genetics)

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