Expert: Nafeesah - 4/12/2010

Question
Hi, I'm a 37 year old father of 5 and just yesterday decidet to separate from my verbally abusive wife. I would love to go over all the little details,but lets just say the last 10 years have not been easy. She has been very verbally abusive to my son (first marriage, her stepson) and me. Counseling didn't help so here I am..... My biggest problem is that now I feel guilty of my decision,since she let me have it today and told me that it is all my fault. I really can't think straight anymore and need to know if it is normal to feel that way. I have serious doubts, that I have made the right decision and jeapardized the well being of my kids. Please help....

Answer
You should consider moving on because you don't want your kids seeing their mother behaving like this and she's out of line for verbally abusing your son from your first marriage. Do you feel that she's got some kind of undiagnosed mental illness? She may have some issues going on that is more medically than emotionally and the emotional abuse is an end result of that. Getting out of this marriage will not only help you, but help your children too. If you had children together look at getting full custody of them if your wife's been abusing them too because better the stable parent than the unstable one. Sounds like your wife maybe bipolar/manic depressant because emotional and verbal abuse are some of the traits of this mental condition.It's about you and the welfare of your children your wife doesnt seem to care about you or anyone for that matter.....You can do better than to be married to someone who treats you and your kids like crap.