Expert: Azure - 5/28/2010

Question
My boyfriend is 19 years old, he has a disk in his back pressing up against a sciatic nerve that runs down his leg. He got injured from moving a fridge. His doctor prescribed him oxycontin because he is in severe pain all the time. His mom constantly tells him hes F***Ked on drugs and His face looks F****ed because of his acne and "do you like people staring at all the S***t on your face all the time".Shes even told him she doesnt think I will want to be around him because of the way he looks hes gotten so depressed and insecure and he thinks he is so ugly he hates being around people.

How do I make him feel better, I love him so much we have been together 3 years and it hurts me to see him hurt like this

He is planning to move out but that takes money. Hes saving like crazy to get the hell out of there.and we are going to move in together... How do I make him feel better until then?

Answer
i'd tell him that the only thing he can control is his own feelings, otherwise he becomes dependent on HER behavior as to how he feels; the best way he can set himself free is to think, "lord forgive her, as she knows not what she does.."that means he looks upon her with sadness and compassion, realizing that how she has become is because of HER upbringing/experiences that made her that way--thusly, her poor behavior choices now are something she probably can't do anything about...in this manner, what she says/does won't bother him as it does now; also, keep him in the PRESENT, just enjoying the moment--avoid the topic as much as possible, considering it non-relevant...talk about abuse..pretty abusive ratings, considering it was crystal clear, extremely polite, and great advice, considering the options...