Expert: Azure - 5/24/2010

Question
QUESTION: Hi Azure

I just want to know if it is wrong to never want to speak to a sibling again?

My elder sister who is four years older that me is 26 and had ADHD, suffering from depression, might have Bipolar or Schizophrenia. The police have been involved more than once because she has abused me, my other sister and my mum physically, mentally and everything else. She has been sent to a mental home to get help and is now on medication. Also I live with her which makes it hard because she controls everyone.

I can not stand her. Today I was watching tv and she turns it off while I was watching it and didn't ask if I wanted it turned off. Which any normal person or my self would do. She has thrown my other sisters tv out the window, bashed my mum, killed my fish, threatend to kill me, hates that I have a job and she can't get work, she eats  the food that I cook or throws it in the bin if I get to it fast enough. She is manipulating and calculating. She uses me and my mum and then hurts us and always thins she is right and everyone else is wrong. She will fight for hours to proof she is right but it's completely not true....when she is wrong she never admits it.

Eg. she thought I put a virus on the computer but i was at my bestfriend's house and told her I did not. She kept screaming saying i did but I didn't and then after 2 hours of yelling my other sister came home and said it was her not me. Anyway she said I was evil and every hurtful word in the book and never appologised.  

She told me she hopes I die because no one would be at my funeral, don't invite me to your wedding coz you only want to make me jealous. She has a chid from a man she left and finds it hard to lose weight and find a man. She also don't like when I date guys oz she gets jealous.

I am such a nice person and I have to go through this.

I don't want her in my life. I don't hate her I forgive her for all the crap and pain she has put me through but I don't want to know her...coz she is so negative and at the end of the day I want to live a happy life. Is it normal for people not contact certain family members? I am close to my whole family but she doesn't like anyone in the family.

Please help thanks

Nita

ANSWER: why are you still living there?

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: I am financially not secure. Believe me if I was then I would leave. I just had a job interview today in my field and have been offered work experience and maybe a job later on.

Renting is very expensive especially for someone who doesn't earn much.

Answer
the sister thing is non-changeable..best to think, "lord forgive them, for they know not what they do..", and try to avoid interaction with her; but the long term solution is getting out of there--focus your time/energy on becoming self-sufficient...