Expert: Nafeesah - 12/17/2011

Question
my husband pushes my buttons to the point i yell. his voice is loud just talking so he easily over talks when i am trying to speak which is so incredibly frustrating i either walk away or end up yelling.
here is a very recent example of what is going on:
the other night i went off to bed I get up for work at 5am he came to bed around midnight and I could hear him telling the two dogs to lay down in their beds.
well they were moving around in their dog beds a bit and I heard him get up and go over to my dog (the one i had before we got married) and say "lay the fk down" in the harshest voice ever. I got up and walked over to him and said dont talk to my dog like that, and i said he was fkn nuts and all he cared about were the dogs.. i took my dog downstairs and slept there with her.
its been 4 days now and he has barely spoken to me. the reason I yelled is, he often texts me if he is at work to be sure my daughter changes the dogs water dishes and puts fresh water in there every 4 hours! he talks to them like they are kids, honestly if one barks at him he will bark back and he will say buddy you wanna go out you wanna eat what do you want. he often puts them out then says oh can you let them in, but its like 2 times every hour i have timed it.. its NUTS.
I feel bad i yelled at him, however I thought he was being disrepectful to me cause I had to work in the morning and disrepectufl tone to the dog.
Now he is saying that (I) have anger issues and I need help and I am abusive to him.
I have been seing a counceller because of these problems ongoing, and my 17 year old daughter also, he has yelled at her because her hair dryer is too loud in the morning when he is trying to sleep. he has told me if she turns it on he will go in there grab it and bust it.
i gave him the number because i told him to go speak to the counceller i was seeing and left the number on his desk. he never called. he said when i asked he had nothing to talk about i was the one with the issues not him.

Answer
My apologies for the delay I am getting a lot of people writing in to me about various things surrounding this topic. I think it's time to look at whether you need to be in this relationship because you deserve more than someone who is going to talk down to you like you're the idiot. You have a child to think about that's more important than your husband's denial and childish behavior.