Question I am 23 and my boyfriend is 26. We've been together for about 9 yrs. When my boyfriend was 17 he went into rehab for drugs. He came out of rehab and to this day has not touched drugs. But about 2 yrs ago he started drinking a little. Nothing bad. Mostly just on weekends. We moved in together in March of this year. The past few months he has gone from drinking only on weekends to drinking basically every night. And he drinks until he passes out sometimes peeing himself. The situation has been getting worse and the verbal abuse is killing me. He has not hit me but he has broken a lot of my things and has basically kept me prisoner sometimes when he's really drunk by blocking the door or hiding my keys. I do not drink with him and I can't find how to make him stop. He turns into someone I do not recognize and someone I hate. Sober I love him to death and he is a VERY caring person, which is why im still here. I don't understand how he can go from one extreme to the next with his personality. We have had many talks while he is sober and he understands he is wrong and always feels very guilty, but he always thinks he can control it so he starts drinking again, with the same result. He's been under alot of stress which I know is mostly the cause but how do I help him find another way to deal. Im stressed too!! I am so lost and I don't know what to do. I know I can't make him do anything he doesn't want to do, but is there something I can say that maybe I haven't been saying? I just need an outsiders opinion and advice. Please help. Sorry this was so long.
Answer Dear Angie
You need to start attending meetings of Alanon, which is a support group for people effected by alcohol. Your boyfriend may or may not be an alcoholic, but it sounds like you are being effected by his use of alcohol. I would also recommend that you move out. His drinking will only get worse and you might get hurt.
