Expert: james52144@earthlink.net - 3/29/2007

Question
man i feel betrayed! is it my expections of her? is it my childhood that takes my abilities to love? is it my self worth? (self-esteem) or is it " i am not meant to be in love?" it seems to me that everything would be going fine then BAMM out of the blue the " me you and GOD against the world!" goes out the window and i am caught with my mouth wide open and it angers me like "how could you betray me" and i go for the juggler why? and what am i doing wrong? is this a common problem? i am 39 yrs old, what am i not doing right? thanks  
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Answer
Dear Robert

Most anger problems arise from unresolved traumas or abuse suffered during childhood. Anger is energy turned outward, guilt is the same energy turned inward. The relationships you have with others is the same relationship that you have with yourself. You can take anger management classes, workshops, go through years of therapy, or you can make peace with yourself and forgive yourself for not living up to what you think other people expect from you. The simple, but not easy solution, is to forgive yourself. You are your own worst critic, when you can be your biggest fan. Your choice.