Expert: james52144@earthlink.net - 12/16/2006

Question
My friend is miserable as she is in an abusive relationship.Her husband of 3 mons. is nice to her when friends and family are around only. She seems to be dying a slow death daily. He gives her gifts to make it appear that she is loved,yet privatly she is verbally and emotionaly abused.There have been a few physical incidents. She can not talk to him, he gets mad and madder. She feels trapped and is waiting for God. What should she do?  

Answer
Dear Sharon

She needs counseling for battered spouse syndrome, and she needs to decide whether the risk of physical injury is great enough to leave him. I have a very low tolerance for abusive people, but people who have battered spouse syndrome keep getting abused until they get seriously injured. She needs counseling desperately.