Expert: Azure - 7/27/2006

Question
I am going out on a limb here and hoping this is the correct
category. I am in my 30s and feel that I have learned a lot from
past relationships, but have never been faced with this situation.
I have been dating a girl for 4 months, and it is amazing. We are
both intelligent with stable lives. Things moved fast and we
talked about a serious future, and we both could not be happier.

She has an office job and also had a side job doing "marketing",
which I assumed was the old Amway/Quixtar pyramid scheme,
and thought, ok, it is her time and money, let her do her own
thing. She has never asked me to be involved or tried to sell me
on it.

She got involved 4 years ago through an ex and for the first 2
years, just went to meetings to be with him. She has now
developed friendships at this place and has been involved in
working there for 2 years.

I did some research online and found some pretty scarry things
about the businesses she is associated with. There are talks of
brainwashing and cult like activities at these functions. I
approched her with these concerns and she assures me there is
nothing like this going on. I keep worrying that if I stay with her,
she is going to be pressured to have me join, and when I do not,
they will convince her I am not the right guy. This could happen
in a week, or a year, I have not idea. I may be over examining
the entire situation.

Soo...do I stick with her and hope my fears of this brainwashing
dissolve, give her an ultimatum of "me or them" or just walk
away from the most amazing girl I have ever met to avoid being
hurt?

Thanks!
J

Answer
i wouldn't be overly concerned; just judge her on her behavior towards YOU; if you notice distressing changes, then certainly you can call on whatever options you choose at that time; as you get to know her, no doubt your knowledge will include this area of her life, and again, you'll have the opportunity to re-evaluate the situation; until then, nothing ventured, nothing gained...