Expert: Beverley Glazer - 12/19/2008

Question
What is advisable when having a family Christmas dinner with a grandson who is allowed out of Rehab for the holidays
Should we abstain from having alcohol at all...
The family usually would have a cocktail before dinner and wine with dinner....
We do not want to jeopardize this young man's sobriety...
I would appreciate your counsel..

Answer
Hi Pat,

Just got back from vacation - but the response to your question can also serve to help you with your grandson's problem whenever alcohol is involved.

Here is one theory: Do not have any alcohol in the house - and if you're having a party, bring it in strictly for that purpose and don't keep it around.

#2 : Everything should be normal and it's up to the alcoholic not to drink it.

#3 : Never, never bring alcohol into the house, nor serve it at parties when the alcoholic is present.

I agree with the first theory but as the alcoholic becomes more stable, combine it with the 2nd theory. The alcoholic has to learn to live in the real world, and have the tools to deal with it. But I'd still not have alcohol around after the party, if an alcoholic lives in the house.

Because your grandson is still in rehab, I would avoid all alcohol at this time. He would want things to be 'normal' but just tell him that everyone loves him and it's OK.

Although late, hope this information will be helpful for the future.
Here's more info that may help you. http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com/treatment_recovery.html

Thanks for writing AllExperts,

Have a Happy New Year!!

Beverley Glazer MA,ICADC,CGA