Expert: Rebos - 3/11/2008

Question
Hi!  My name is Kathy; I am an alcoholic. I have been attending AA meetings regularly,4-5 times a week, for 4 months and I have a sponsor.  But-I continue to have slips. I drank last night, at home, alone. I want sobriety. As you said, its that 1st drink that gets me drunk. Each day, after a slip, I start over. I want each slip to be my LAST, but it continues to happen.  I am discouraged.  Can you say/tell me something to encourage me.  I continue to go to meetings, but I feel like a fraud. It helped when you said many alcoholics continue to drink while attending meetings. I've never attended drunk; I drink that night, after. HELP!!

Answer
Good afternoon Kathy and thank you for your question.

Since you haven’t told me any details as to the way you are working your AA program… I’m going to have to guess at a number of things. Have you really asked your Higher Power to remove your desire to drink… and mean it? You say that you are going to 4-5 meetings a week, (what’s wrong with going to seven meetings a week) BUT ARE YOU ACTIVE in any group? You do realize that the “good fairy” doesn’t set up the hall, make the coffee, do shopping for the goodies or help to clean-up after the meeting is over. It’s the people who are interested in staying sober that do the work because they know that getting active in a group is what helps to keep them sober. They become a part of the group rather than apart from the group. Furthermore, I would bet that you don’t attend 12 step meetings and that you haven’t taken your fearless moral inventory yet! Nor have you followed through with your fifth step! If your sponsor has not taken a fourth and fifth step and regularly go to 12 step meetings, and doesn’t have a sponsor of his own… then you may have the wrong sponsor! Have you ever tried to call your sponsor before you pick up a drink? That may be a good idea!

Unless I have more detail as to how you are working your program that’s about all that I can suggest to you. I would be pleased to help you further if you chose to contact me again. Thank you Rebos