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About Derek Johnson
Expertise
Any behavior in which you are compelled to engage in when you do not want to can lead to an addiction.
Experience
I offer counseling (http://www.kasamba.com/derek-johnson) of all types -drugs, alcohol, sexual, anger, depression, co-dependency, anxiety, grief, stress, eating disorders, distortions of thought, compulsions, mood disorders, controlling behaviors, inferiority, marriage and family, motivation, life coaching, relapse prevention and recovery counseling- from an eclectic approach.
My abilities are being refined daily by supervising a counseling center that offers counseling to 120 clients. I have 10 years of direct care in all counseling arenas. I also have 2 years experience working with the mentally handicapped. Additionally, I have 2 years experience in Marriage and Family relationship issues. I have personally and unfortunately experienced sexual abuse, a suicide attempt and many addictions. This gives me a unique perspective in helping others.
Organizations
Teen Challenge of Florida
Florida Certification Board
International Society for Mental Health Online
International Certification & Reciprocity Consortium
Education/Credentials
Certified Mental Health Professional # 50190 (MA)/ Certified Addiction Professional #3279 (MA) / Bachelor of Science in Psychology and Sociology / Internationally Certified Counselor #24570 / Certified by the Florida Certification Board / Certified by International Certification & Reciprocity Consortium / NET Institute Diploma for Counseling and Addiction Studies.
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You are here: Experts > Health/Fitness > Substance Abuse > Addiction to Alcohol > Sister is an alcholic
Expert: Derek Johnson
Date: 5/1/2008
Subject: Sister is an alcholic
Question
I am not sure as to what I can and should do.
My sister and I had a very strained relationship.About 2 year ago my husband had to lay her off along with my mother. They were working for his mortgage company and things had become very financially tight. About 5 total were laid off. She has never let it go and seems angrier then ever at him and myself. It was a difficult road but my mother has since gotten over it and moved on. My sister on the other hand has not. She found another job and 6 months later was laid off again, but not before a series of instances that have left our relationship to the point of not really speaking. We were as close as 2 sisters could be just prior to the laying off. She was dating a man who I believe drank all the time. Full well knowing my sister had a problem with alcohol. While she was working at the second job, they broke up. It was difficult on her. She had been drinking and calling me at all times of day. Sometimes for me to tell her she is not crazy other times to yell at me for whatever story she had made up in her head. She finally reach rock bottom and we had to put her into a hospital. She was kept in for 3 days. She started to see a councilor and was placed on an anti-depressant. Now almost a year later, I don't believe she is seeing her councilor or taking medicine. I know she is drinking again and no one (mother or other sister) seem to see it as their problem. My older sister said one thing at a time. I think her drinking should be our main concern right now. My sick sister hates me more then ever and We barely talk anymore. How on earth do I confront her and get her into treatment again??
Answer
Usually the main motivating factor for someone to seek help is "rock bottom" as you describe. It is simply coming to the point where the consequences of using the chemical begins to outweigh the benefits. Until this begins to happen for her usually no amount of convincing her to enter treatment will be of any value. She most likely will not remain with it for very long.
Your sister needs unconditional love more than any confrontation at this point. She knows that she is not doing well and the right thing. She experiences the shame and guilt for her actions on a daily basis. She medicates her unforgiveness and bitterness that she harbors daily. What she needs more than anything is to be loved and accepted exactly for who she is.
This does not mean you approve of her behaviors - it simply means that you love, support and cherish her for the unique creation that she is. And when the time comes that she cries out for help - she will turn to you because she can trust you.
www.liveperson.com/derek-johnson
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