Expert: Beverley Glazer - 4/29/2009

Question
Hi. My husband is an alcoholic; he has been sober for a year but started to drink again two weeks ago. He promised to go to a meeting tonight but he went to a bar...I am afraid that he might loose his job. I am very worried about him, about us. I love him but I am not sure what to do to help. We talk, he promisees not to drink and get help, but next day he drinks again...what can I do?

Answer
Hi Fabia,

Unfortunately you can do nothing to help your husband with his alcoholism, but you must be more assertive. Demand that he gets help. Tell him you love him but if he doesn't get help you will be forced to leave.

Not only does he have to go to meetings, he has to get a sponsor and do the 12 steps. This is what they are: http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com/12-step-program-of-aa.html

This is a life-long commitment and he probably feels like a failure since he slipped after 2 years and now has to take a beginner's chip. In AA language 'relapse is part of recovery', so the members will also understand.

For yourself, the best thing to do is attend Al Anon meetings. This is a 12 step program for family members of alcoholic/addicts. It will help you to stay strong, and give you the support that you need as well.

I hope this information is helpful,
Thank you for writing All Experts

Lots of luck!!

Bev
http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com