AboutBeverley Glazer Expertise I can answer questions on all addictive behaviors: alcohol, drugs, food, compulsive sex, codependency, gambling, compulsive shoplifting etc.
Experience I have over 20 years experience working in the addiction field. My experience extends to all levels of substance abuse. I've worked in rehabs and detox centers, prisons and half-way houses and have a busy private practice as well as an active website where I can be reached for recovery coaching and consultation. I am a cognitive behavioral therapist, but 12-step programs are an excellent support. When working in the addiction field, there is no cookie-cutter solution. In the recovery field, you witness miracles. That's why I love what I do.
Organizations NAADAC The Association for Addiction Professionals, CACCF Canadian Addiction Counselors Federation, CCA Canadian Counseling Association,
For more information please see: http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com
Education/Credentials BA Psychology, MA Counseling Psychology, ICADC International Alcohol and Drug Counselor, ICAC International Clinical Addiction Counselor,
CGC Certified Gambling Counselor.
Question I have been dating a 41 year old young lady (I am 60) for the past 6 months. It is a serious relationship, I have more or less moved in with her. She just celebrated her the anniversary of sobriety. We do fine most of the time, but she becomes a different person a few days a month, maybe PMS. But harbors real fears, needs her space, becomes very combative, fearing, scared, totally another person. She keeps telling me we come from different worlds, I have never had a drug problem, have not drank since we started dating seriously, with no need to.
Is this dysfunctional behavior part of of alcohol recovery or more a woman hormonal problem. She goes to countless meetings of AA and Alanon. Your thoughts
Answer Hi Alan,
There can be many reasons that the woman in your life is combative, fearful and becomes 'totally another person' but the fact is, that she told you that you come from different worlds - and that's very true. The more you understand about her world, the easier it will be for both of you.
First, in AA language, she may be 'clean, but not sober'. This means that she's not using alcohol, but she doesn't have 'sober' thinking. To get this, not only does she have to go to meetings, but she has to have a sponsor and work the 12 steps.
And once she works the steps, she should also rework them with a sponsor, because situations change.
I'm not clear why she goes to Alanon meetings because these meetings are for family members of alcoholics, but it would be very helpful for you to go to them ( preferably different meetings than hers). The members will be helpful and supportive with the problems that you're facing.
Thank you for contacting All Experts,
I hope this information is helpful and feel free to contact me for more advice.
