Expert: Jan Edward Williams - 8/12/2009

Question
My husband (33yrs old) is an alcoholic and we both understand that “One day an Alcoholic always an Alcoholic”. He went to AA meetings and got help from medical detoxi office and was able to stay sober for almost 3 years. Lately this old friend came back to him. I though he can quit it once then he can do it again but not until tonight I realized how bad the situation is. He had too much to drink, rest on bed and ready to pass out.  Suddenly he fell off the bed by hitting his head on the side table and had no idea what just happened. I quickly turn on the light and check if he was injured. There was no blood but his face doesn’t look right (I don’t know how to describe it, but for sure it is not because hitting the side table, it is more like people who is having a stroke) I keep calling his name but can’t wake him up. I panic and going to call 911, 5 seconds later he suddenly woke up and said “I had a bad dream- someone pushed me” then talked to me normally about 10 mis like nothing happened, then pass out.
I have following questions hope you can help me
1.   If similar alcohol poisoned/blackout/emergency situation happens again (hopefully not), before 911/help arrives what can I do?
2.   I know the Al-Aono is for anyone who's life has been affected by someone else's drinking. Then does it also have programs for alcoholic themselves?
3.   I understand that my husband needs to go back to AA meeting also needs help from medical office. Other than that, is there anything we or I can do to help?
4.   This disease is never going to stop. It is not healthy for families and relationships. Sometimes I fell that love is just not enough, I can not imaging my/our life is going to keep repeat like this for the next 30, 40 or 50 years. We don’t have any kids yet, any suggestions on this matter?

Many Thanks!

(I apologize for misspelling and grammar problems, I am just eager get my questions out)

Answer
Hello Jane,
I regret that you have to experience alcoholism again in your loved one after some years of sobriety, and highly recommend you attend meetings of Al-Anon, the 12 Step Program for those in a relationship with an alcoholic, http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/ and that your husband return to AA. You are correct that love is not enough in this situation, which is why I urge you attend Al-Anon. There you can not only find support, but will be able, over time, to get a clear picture of your own options in this situation. Part of your question involves issues that are within the expertise of the medical profession, not mine. I strongly suggest that you try to get your husband to see a physician to check out the issues behind the dangerous incident that you described, and to get some advice as to how to handle the situation should it arise again. Good luck to you. You can find more information and professional help on my website cited below my name here.
Jan Edward Williams, MS, JD, LCADC
http://www.alcoholdrugsos.com
jwilliams@alcoholdrugsos.com