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Addiction to Alcohol/daughter is an alcoholic

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Expert: - 3/24/2010


Question
My daughter is 29 years old and has two children, ages 11 and 7.  They all live with us.  She is irresponsible, disappears for hours at a time, and most of the time doesn't take care of their basic needs.  She appears to be an alcoholic but won't admit it.  Although it might be easy for her Father %26 I to tell her to leave and seek help, we cannot put the children out and we fear that if we push her to that, she will "steal" the children and then we will lose them--making their little lives more miserable.  Can you give some advice?

Answer

Beverley Glazer MA. IC
Hi Carol,

Your daughter is living with you, so she can be even more irresponsible knowing the children will be cared for.  An alcoholic will do what they want to do, regardless of anyone else. You must stand firm with her.

A mother's right to her children is very strong, however, because she's an alcoholic, she may not be able to take the kids away from you. Find out your legal rights.

Demand that she gets help or she has to leave. If she takes the kids with her, you can call in social services if she's not caring for them properly. As grandparents, you'd be next in line as caregivers. What you're doing by this is not only helping the kids, but pressuring her into treatment so she can have her kids.

Alanon meetings may also help you. Many of the members will be in similar situations and their support can benefit you at this very difficult time.

I hope this information is helpful,

Thank you for asking AllExperts

Good luck!!

Beverley Glazer
http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com

Beverley Glazer

Expertise

I can answer questions on all addictive behaviors: alcohol, drugs, food, compulsive sex, codependency, gambling, compulsive shoplifting etc.

Experience

I have over 20 years experience working in the addiction field. My experience extends to all levels of substance abuse. I've worked in rehabs and detox centers, prisons and half-way houses and have a busy private practice as well as an active website where I can be reached for recovery coaching and consultation. I am a cognitive behavioral therapist, but 12-step programs are an excellent support. When working in the addiction field, there is no cookie-cutter solution. In the recovery field, you witness miracles. That's why I love what I do.

Organizations
NAADAC The Association for Addiction Professionals, CACCF Canadian Addiction Counselors Federation, CCA Canadian Counseling Association, For more information please see: http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com

Education/Credentials
BA Psychology, MA Counseling Psychology, ICADC International Alcohol and Drug Counselor, ICAC International Clinical Addiction Counselor, CGC Certified Gambling Counselor.

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