Expert: Jurriaan Plesman, Nutritional Psychotherapist - 5/2/2010

Question
I dont know what i am doing anymore. I have been with my boyfriend for four years now. Alcohol has always been our biggest fight. It has gotton him in trouble in the past as well. We now have a son. When i was pregnet the first months were awful he was always drinking but then he stopped. He stopped right up untill about a month before i was due. Like all of a sudden reality set in and he freaked out again. I have tried to be strong and leave but i always come back. I really do love him. The thing that is so hard is when he is sober he gets depressed and gets mad at me for everything. he says i treat him like a child. That i only have a one track mind. I try to find things for us to do that dont involve alcohol or being around it. But he just acts like he doesnt want any part of it. Its really beginning to take a toll on me. I just dont know what else to do. I want to have my family be a family. I try to be understanding but after awhile when he wont let anyone help him i just get upset. I understand how hard this is for him. I just dont understand why he thinks he needs to do it on his own. There is people out there to help who know what he is going through. I just am at the end and need some advise on how to save us.

Answer
Dear marie,

I fully understand what you are going through. Alcoholism is a very difficult disease to treat, and your husband is probably right in believing that he has to to do it on his own. Most drug rehab centres are not very successful in treating alcoholism or addiction, because generally they have no clue as to the underlying biochemistry of addiction. It is a disease, but if you believe it is mainly "psychological" you are barking up the wrong tree.

On the other hand, if your husband does not get treated, then you have to seriously consider a divorce, for an untreated alcoholic will ultimately destroy human relationships and families. The fact that he gets depressed when he stops drinking, shows that depression is a the forerunner of addiction. Addiction is self-medication against depression. Ultimately depression needs to be treated, for him to get better.

You both should read te following articles to get an understanding of why some people become addicted and others are not.

Why Alcoholics Drink? at
http://www.hypoglycemia.asn.au/articles/WAD.html
Alcoholism (Addiction) is a Treatable Disease at:
http://curezone.com/upload/PDF/Articles/jurplesman/alcoholism_treatable.pdf
Drug Addiction is a Nutritional Disorder at:
http://www.hypoglycemia.asn.au/articles/drug_addictions_nutritional_disorder.htm...
Depression is a Nutritional Disorder at:
http://www.hypoglycemia.asn.au/articles/depression_disorder.html
Depression: a Disease of Energy Production at:
http://curezone.com/upload/PDF/Articles/jurplesman/depression_energy32.pdf
Silent Diseases and Mood Disorders at:
http://www.hypoglycemia.asn.au/articles/silentdiseases.html
Conquering Anxiety, Depression and Fatigue Without Drugs - the Role of Hypoglycemia by Prof. Joel H. Levitt
http://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/hypoglycemia.htm

and ask for a referral to a Nutritional Doctor, Clinical Nutritionist or a Nutritional Psychologist, if self-help therapy fails.
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