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Addiction to Alcohol/Is my room mate an alcoholic?

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Expert: - 5/10/2010


Question
I have a room mate who I am worried about. He has phases where he will drink excessive amounts of alcohol. By phase, I mean several weeks if not months where he will go through a micky of alcohol in a single night. He says he drinks to dull the pain. I understand that his parents are separated, and his dad is ill, but both parents are still around and keep in contact with him. I have tried to talk about the drinking with him, and he laughs it off, saying he only binges on it sometimes and that I drink too. I do drink, maybe a beer with dinner, or if we are having people over, but never to the extent that he does. In fact, he cant even go to the movies without bringing a bottle with him filled with strait alcohol.

I don't know how to help him, as he doesn't think he has a problem and so he wont listen. I need him to listen though, to help get his life back in order.

Do you have any advice?

Answer

Beverley Glazer MA. IC
Hi Kristina,

Your room mate has discovered that 'drinks dull the pain', so he's not drinking simply to get drunk. He's 'self medicating' with alcohol so he doesn't have to deal with life. If he's not already an alcoholic, he's on the way to becoming one.

Here's some information on binge drinking: http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com/binge-drinking-facts.html

Binge drinking is never good for the body, however, it may be alcohol abuse and not necessarily dependence.

Don't talk to him about  drinking, because he will only defend it. He's in denial and won't listen anyway.

Tell him that he has painful problems in his life and he has to deal with them -- not avoid them.  Suggest that he gets counseling.

Unfortunately, there's not much more that you can do (except listen -- when he's not drunk). But keep on urgeing him to get help so he can get his life back on track.

I hope this information is helpful.
Thank you for asking Allexperts

Regards

Bev
http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com  
    Questioner's Rating
    Rating(1-10)Knowledgeability = 9Clarity of Response = 10Politeness = 10
    CommentThank you for the help, I will definetly check out that website. I have suggested councelling and he refuses, but I will make sure to bring it up again. Thanks once again!


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Beverley Glazer

Expertise

I can answer questions on all addictive behaviors: alcohol, drugs, food, compulsive sex, codependency, gambling, compulsive shoplifting etc.

Experience

I have over 20 years experience working in the addiction field. My experience extends to all levels of substance abuse. I've worked in rehabs and detox centers, prisons and half-way houses and have a busy private practice as well as an active website where I can be reached for recovery coaching and consultation. I am a cognitive behavioral therapist, but 12-step programs are an excellent support. When working in the addiction field, there is no cookie-cutter solution. In the recovery field, you witness miracles. That's why I love what I do.

Organizations
NAADAC The Association for Addiction Professionals, CACCF Canadian Addiction Counselors Federation, CCA Canadian Counseling Association, For more information please see: http://www.untwist-your-thinking.com

Education/Credentials
BA Psychology, MA Counseling Psychology, ICADC International Alcohol and Drug Counselor, ICAC International Clinical Addiction Counselor, CGC Certified Gambling Counselor.

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