Addiction to Alcohol/Recovery?


My brother is a recovering alcoholic, although. His commitment to recovering seems to be driven by the fact he is still under probation till tomorrow.  He claims he is recovered, but nothing about his attitude towards family and friends has changed since he quit drinking.  He is super critical of everyone and loves to point out everyone's shortcomings.  Today is the last day of his probation from his last alcohol violation. He announced today that he will be getting everyone a bottle of their favorite liquor for Christmas, because it would be easy one stop shopping and he is too busy.  He then proceeded to list the members of the family and what he would be buying them.  None of us really drink much other than a beer or a glass of wine on a special occasions.  We are all very worried as he has never taken his problem very seriously.  He hasn't had a drink in over a year.   His probation ends tomorrow and we are all terrified this statement from him is just the beginning of his next episode of drinking?

    Thank you for your explanation of the situation.  Indeed your brother is experiencing what we could call a "dry drunk."  That means we aren't drinking but nothing else has changed.  He seems to think, at least by his comments, that somehow, some way he will be able to drink like a normal person.  If he is truly alcoholic, and only he can decide this for himself, the fact is that he can not drink like everyone else.  He will soon find that out.
     So what to do?  I would suggest that each of you politely refuse the gifts of alcohol from him this year as your statement to him about the seriousness of his problem.  This might be enough to cause him to rethink.  Who knows?  As you refuse alcohol you are saying to him that it is not an important part of who you are so maybe he will get the message about this one year dry and start to consider really looking into his problem.
     Hope this may have helped.
Grace and Peace,

Addiction to Alcohol

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I can answer questions on the recovery from alcohol addiction as I am a recovering alcoholic with 24 years of sobriety. I can also address the spiritual aspects of the 12-Step program as I have a Master of Divinity degree; serve as a pastor in the Quaker church; and, serve as a hospice chaplain. I have also served as a prison chaplain for one year and currently volunteer as a mentor once a week, working with two inmates one-on-one as they work towards reentry into society as free persons.


I am a recovering alcoholic with 24 years of continuous sobriety.

Master of Divinity awarded in 2000 from Garrett-Evangelical Theological Seminary

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