Addiction to Alcohol/functional/dsyfuncion

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Question
Hi Druideck,   my question to you is... can a so far functioning alcoholic and a dysfunctional alcoholic have a true relationship? What tends to happen in the near future for both parties?   I know she the functioning has held a job down as a bartender but does not have much to offer.  She is supporting an unmarried daughter and a 3 year old grandson. I think she believes all is good until the money runs out and she will have to pick up the slack.    The dysfunctional alcoholic has only limited resources left and should be out in the next 3 months with the way both are spending.  They are not married just living together.  Also with her being the functioning alcoholic is there limitations within herself that enough is enough or can this cause her to progress down the same path?   I have been doing some reading on line and the chances of this relationship working is slim to none.   I respect your option on this matter.  How do you feel this relationship pans out?  She has nothing to lose but move out.  What is left of him?
thank you"

Answer
Hi Joanne,

It is difficult to have a stable relationship when both parties are unrecovered alcoholics.
This does not mean they will not learn something from the experience.
If we want healthy relationships then we must first be as healthy mentally and emotionally
as is possible

Of course these things are never ending and we should continue our personal growth
through˘ut our life whether we are alcoholics or not.

A better question might be what your concern is concerning these two alcoholics.
Is there something you fear will affect you?
They may not be capable of relating in a healthy way but they will learn in time what
they need to do.

I would suggest turniing your  focus to your own feelings and see if you can let go
and allow them to learn from experience.

All personal growth is about ourself, this is where you can gain the most.
Examine your own thoughts and ask why others concern you so much.
What do you gain by rating their success or failure in this matter?

Food for thought anyway.

Take care,
Druideck
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Addiction to Alcohol

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Druideck

Expertise

All questions are important, I have over 30 years of personal experience with alcoholism and recovery issues. Advanced Counsellor Training / Experience with treatment and AA.

Experience

Over 30 years of recovery from alcoholism. Counsellor in an alcohol outpatient office. Experience as client and as counsellor in treatment center.

Education/Credentials
Advanced counsellor certificate, Melbourne ORYGEN Research Centre volunteer consultant

Awards and Honors
AADAC volunteer award

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