Expert: Rebos - 5/4/2007

Question
Hi there Rebos.
My mum's an alcoholic and has been for about two years now.  I know it doesn't seem long compared to other people, but I don't know how to deal with it.  She's lost her job twice now due to alcohol, and all she ever does nowadays is drink.  To be honest, the scary part is that she's abolsutely addicted to Glen's Vodka.  I usually have to confiscate about two or three bottles a day after school.
It's actually really strange.  For a couple of days she'll be mostly fine, telling me we're going to have a wonderful time and that life seems to be getting better.  But the next thing I know she's staggering and yelling at me, her eyes glazed over.  And then I find the empty bottle.
Please, I'm so scared.  I used to self-harm a while ago and I'm slipping back into it again.  My mum doesn't cook anymore, and I'm having trouble finding anything to eat in the house.  My mum's also losing weight, she's starting to look like a human skeleton.  Most of the time I just want to cry really badly but I don't let myself, I've developed a strange habit of not showing proper emotion, which means I get mood swings.  I'm an only child, and I've been living like this for two years now, since I was thirteen.
Please, what can I do?

From Samantha

Answer
Good afternoon Samantha:

Thank you for your question, and I am sorry that you find yourself in such a situation that you are in. By deduction from your email I am to assume that you are fifteen years old and still in grade school. That you have no other relatives you can talk to about your mother’s drinking to ask them for advice. But in any case my suggestion is that you go to your school counselor and tell him or her, what is going on in your home life. That your mother has a drinking problem and that you would like to attend Al-Ateen meetings. I’m sure that he or she will help you find them. In fact I wouldn’t be surprised that you already have them in your school system. You may be very surprised seeing a number of you friends at the meetings.

Your mother has the disease of alcoholism. Yes, it is a “disease” the American Medical Association says that it is. At Al-Ateen you will find other kids that have a parent who has a drinking problem, and they can tell you how they manage their lives with a drunken parent. It’s really a great program for young people.

Please remember that you alone can’t solve your mother’s drinking problem… you must seek outside help, and that help is for you to start attending Al-Ateen meetings regularly. Thank you, Rebos