Expert: Jacqui - 1/11/2008

Question
QUESTION: what do you do when you trust no one.. you are 19 lost everyone you love even my lil boy you have been using since you were14 on and off i want help...

ANSWER: Hi Lindsay, I sounds like you are really depressed and I am concerned about your wellbeing.  
There are a few options you could try.  Firstly I think it would be good for you to make contact with a counsellor.  As I am in Australia I am not aware of what is available in your local area, but perhaps the local hospital or a GP could refer you to one.  You don't need to tell them why (as people sometimes react with judgment if you say you are using drugs).  
Another option would be to get in touch with Narcotics Anonymous.  They offer a twelve step program, which isn't for everyone, but it might be worth a try.  I think that human contact with someone who is going to be empathetic would be really helpful for you right now.
If I know what state/area you are in I might be able to look at some other options.
Lindsay you are going through a really rough time by the sounds of it.  However, it is really important that you maintain your resilience.  It may seem that you have lost everything, but you are young and many people recover from drug dependency (in fact it might not seem like it, but most stop using eventually with the right kind of support -although it might take many attempts).  Right now things seem bad, especially if you have lost custody of your little boy, but you can work towards getting him back.  Did Social Services offer to link you in with a social worker?  
Finally ... and you probably know this, but all types of amphetamine can cause psychosis.  Symptoms include paranoia and hallucinations (like you hear someone speaking but they aren't there).  They also cause mood swings.  I know that it will be difficult to keep this in perspective, but the distrust that you are feeling may be partly due to the effects of the drugs.  If it is getting to the point that you feel you need treatment, you might want to think about presenting at the Emergency Dept of a hospital and describing your symptoms to them.  I know that there is a lot of judgement about meth use in the US, and it might be the case that people respond in a way that you don't think is really helpful, but if you are having psychotic symptoms (psychotic is a horrible sounding word, but it really just reflects the symptoms that I mentioned above - and it is a health issue like anything else) you do need help.
Lindsay, try the options I have offered and if you need any more information, please post again.
Best wishes and stay safe,
Jacqui

---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------

QUESTION: i need help with where to get some help i live in amarillo tx...

Answer
I am glad that you got back to me.  You could try making contact with the following agencies - I don't know much about them, but if they can't help, they should at least be able to point you in the right direction:
- Amarillo Council on Alcohol and Drug Abuse - 806-374-6688
- West Texas Counseling and Rehab - 806-373-0922
Best wishes,
Jacqui