Expert: Crystal - 12/4/2008

Question
The guy who is more than my friend recently entered rehab for heroin abuse. I don't understand how to help him. I never dealt with a heroin user before. I love him allot and i want to be there for him. I just don't know if im strong enough anymore to deal with it. I have known him for about 8 months and he just started using the last 2months. HE is in rehab now and i really want to visit him and write to me. I'm just afraid that everything he will say to me will be a lie. I have talked to his family and they told me that everything the whole time of me knowing him has been a lie. I haven't talked to him in the months he has been gone but i need help in knowing what i should do. I really do love his guy. But i don't want to end up getting hard or dealing with his problems anymore. What if he does it again and starts lieing to me again. Please help me out.

Answer
Heather,

I am not sure what answer you are looking for but when an individual is on Narcotics, ie. Heroin, they tend to exaggerate and lie about alot of things in their everyday lives. Some of it is because of the chemical changes that take place in the brain but if he has been lying to you for the whole months then he has been using longer then you are aware of and that is part of accepting where he is at right now. You need to wait and see what he is like out of rehab because that is where you will be able to see if it is him or not. Make sense? Also, you should attend alanon so that you will know how to deal with his changes when he gets out. Being sober is a life long commitment, not just for the addict but for those who are with them and surround them.