Expert: Veronica C. Yost - 3/11/2009

Question
My best friend of 21 years has been addicted to crack for 10 years. He
stays clean for abou 6 weeks and then he would disappear. In November
he went on an 8 day binge which was gut wrenching for me. After every
binge he falls into a deep depression. He isolates himself then finally
comes around. He cries and tells me he wants to be "normal". We
resume our happy life and then another binge. After his last one I made
myself perfectly clear. I told him if he went on another binge I was gone.
He said he wouldn't risk losing me. For the last 17 days he has been on
the street smoking crack. I go out searching for him. I run into him every
few days. He runs from me. I was able to corner him once. It wasn't him!
He was dirty. Wearing the same clothes. Rude. Abnoxious. Cursing at me.
Yelling for me to stop following him. My heart was broken. This is the
longest he's been out. He is skin and bones. Because of the length of time
is there still hope for him to come home? I am desperate. Why do u think
he is out so long? He has no money. Please give me a clue of what he may
be doing and what is going on his head. I'm heart broken and desperate.

Answer
Hello Yvette,
 It is unusual that someone who has been smoking that long can go without the drug for 6 weeks.  More than likely he is using in that 6 week period, just not as much.  When a crack addict does not get the drugs required (by his brain) it causes symptoms LIKE depression.  I recall appearing to have those symptoms but what is actually going on is he has no money, no drugs and is plotting a way to get both.  All that we do is with no other goal than to manipulate those around us in order to get crack.  This may be hard to believe because of how he is presenting it to you.  Sympathy is a power tool to an addict.  He does at some level not want to lose you but don't ever think that you are more important than this drug.  It has consumed his life and his brain's ability to produce Seratonin.  That which gives normal people happiness, enjoyment, pleasure, pain etc.  The brain stops producing this chemical early in the addiction and the user no longer feels "normal" without crack.  His brain needs this chemical and tells him he needs it so therefore he can't live without it.  When the brain takes over the addiction he has no desire to eat, drink or sleep.  There is no sense of fear, danger, right or wrong.  He will do anything to get the drug.  I sold my own body for this crap (crack).  
 When you found him on the street, as with the rest of the time you've known him high, that is not him.  That is the ugly face of addiction.  It is all that is left of who you know.  But I can say this, the attitude that he showed is not one of the drug crack.  That attitude comes from another drug like heroine.  Many addicts will "switch up" to a cheaper drug that has a longer lasting high.  I know that is troubling but he has made a choice (really not him-brain).  Trying to help him now is going to be the hardest thing to do.  He doesn't really want help, it's been too long.  If he were to get help it would have to be a 6 month program where he is locked up and monitored.  Then you are looking at 1 1/2-2 years true recovery time.  His desire to get high will NOT go away for that long.  I still have the urge to get high and it's been over 2 years for me.  
 I don't believe that you are capable of helping him.  He needs professional help.  If he stops, relapse is nearly inevitable.  Only 3% of the population of crack addicts ever stop using.  Relapse will occur with any "trigger" i.e. stress, happiness, television, radio, areas of town, people, certain clothes he wore getting high, tire pressure gauges, dreams, carpet...etc, you think I am kidding I am not.  The list goes on and on.  What he has seen, heard, tasted, watched will come back if it was at a time getting high.
 My opinion is he is too far gone and barely has the fight in him to survive trying to recover.  Yes, we will gladly die for crack/getting high.  Many try and many more fail.  Crack addicts call this beautiful crap, BLACK DEATH.  What more can I say?  What is going through his mind is here in this message.  This is only a small part and is larger than I could ever describe.  If he doesn't get professional help he will be dead.  I am sorry but if he is that thin he will probably be gone from you within 6 months.  He is in a darker place than I can describe and I apologize to reiterating things but it pains me to hear another person will/could be lost to crack.  

 Please ask anything you'd like and excuse my bluntness.  I will be thinking of you and your pain.  If he doesn't get the chance to tell you himself, "I am so sorry.  I didn't know what I was doing.  If I would have known it would never have happened.  I am sorry."