Expert: Veronica C. Yost - 4/25/2009

Question
My boyfriend is addicted to crack, he has been using it since he was 16 years old he stopped using it for 2 years after that because he was in jail. As soon as he got out of jail at 18 he started using it again.I met my boyfriend a year ago when i was 17 and he was 18 , now i am 18 and he is 19 and he is still using it. I met my boyfriend a year ago and found out the truth 8 months ago when he told me.Iam 7 months pregnant and i don't know what to do anymore he has no job he lost his car and even gets mad at me sometimes if i don't give him money. We tried talking about rehab and he says no and that he can stop by himself. The point is I really want to help him but I don't know if I can take it anymore he leaves and comes back every 2 or 3 days later and then leaves again for 2 or 3 days more and comes back home like if nothings wrong.Every time I try to talk to him when he gets home he says he is really sleepy and screams at me if I try to wake him up to talk.Should I leave him?, Do you think he can change?. He makes his grandma give him money and wastes it all on crack and I am tired of this lifestyle. My mom is supporting us in everything right now and its not fair either for her that he doesn't want to help out. Another thing he has attention deficit hyperactive disorder or adhd but he hasn't taken his medication for 3 years do you think it has to do with that? Please help

Answer
Hello Jennifer,
 No the ADHD meds wouldn't cause that.  Unfortunately you have to make a choice on how you want to live your life.  Is this it?  It is very hard for an addict to quit by themselves.  If you force him into rehab he may very well relapse because you can't make someone stop what they don't want too.  It sounds to me like he isn't ready to quit.  Change can come but it takes a long time, years.  
 I am a strong advocate for leaving.  You should worry about yourself and your baby!  He really isn't is he.  If he were he would be home and working.  If you are tired of it all you should leave.  It's not fair to your family to support a drug addict.  If he wants the drug he needs to find the money himself and not put you through his day to day "crap".
 Best of luck and please feel free to ask additional questions.