Expert: Jacqui - 6/20/2009

Question
My 20 year old son is a heroin addict.  He has a bad addiction and has been through several rehabs.  He has felony charges against him and is presently serving a 6 month sentence in a military style boot camp in the prison system.  They perform hard labor and it is rumored that abuse takes place in this facility.  I realize my son is playing with death and I'm wondering if you have any words of wisdom of how to deal with having your son in such a dangerous place.  Of course not being in there might be more dangerous.  Any words of wisdom?

Answer
Hi Susan,

I think it is shocking that there are abuses going on in the system, but unfortunately I am sure this occurs quite often.  

I am not necessarily sure that he is safer where he is right now, and I must admit, I don't think that drug use itself should be illegal.  However, it sounds like there was a more serious offence that may have led to him being on the wrong side of the bars.

I don't know enough about the prison system to understand what is the best way to get by.  I am assuming you are in the US (I don't think we have such things as "military style boot camps" in Australia) and the system over there is getting quite crazy with loads of people in jail.  The only thing I can offer is for him to try to keep his head down, don't get involved in things that he shouldn't, and try to use his time to think about his place in the world.  I know this probably sounds wishy washy, but I am a great believer in "mindfulness" and the capacity to observe the world around us (Mindfulness is an eastern buddhist based philosphy).  

It sounds that your son has some difficult times ahead of him.  But is also sounds like you love him and can provide support.  Having a loving family to come home to is often a huge incentive to someone.  Keep in touch with him.

Finally, I don't know if this is any help, but you might want to speak to a prisoner advocacy group about the things you think might be happening inside the facility.  I am not sure where you are, but would be happy to run an internet search for you to find out who might be able to help in that regard.

Stay strong and safe,

Best wishes

Jacqui