Expert: Caroline West - 8/20/2009

Question
I was in recovery for a year, and upon being put in a VERY stressful and vulnerable situation and not having been to NA meetings for a couple of weeks, relapsed. I feel very weak and guilty, but I have been taking a few benzos and opiates occasionally.  Some more days than others, and then none.  I started taking them more often in the past few weeks, and I am wondering how much I would have to take before becoming addicted again.  I have heard that after every relapse your body takes off where it started before recovery.  How does this work and if I am addicted how hard will it be on my body to detox again.  I am very discouraged with myself but am not in a position right now to go to rehab again.

Answer
Hi Elaine,

Congratulations for the year you were clean. NA definitely helps a lot of addicts stay clean.

What happens with relapse is that as soon as you have that 1 drug,especially what you used before,you,your mind and your body gets a taste for it again. Bare in mind that with every relapse and recovery,you learn something new. Relapses unfortunately does happen but you can regain sobriety again-its not all lost.

You will become addicted very quickly because after a year clean your tolerance has dropped right down and you will start with just a little bit here and there and then your body will start to need more and more again. Even though it will be tough it can be arrested. Your body and mind will become addicted very quickly and the sooner you stop the drugs the easier it is. It will still be hard but much easier than in 6 months time. When you get clean again remember the NA saying "..ones too many,1000's never enough.."

Ok,what to do next. Get back to your meetings straight away. Other members will obviously know you by now and they will do there upmost to offer you strength and support. Do this today if you can. I would also strongly suggest that you get back in contact with your Drug Worker to have a chat. In my experience the more support you have from people who know what the are talking about,the higher your chance of success is. Don't forget that if you feel you are becoming physically dependent on the Opiates and Benzos then get medical help in terms of a short Detox Unit stay if you can or do it at home. Your Drug Team can tell you what the best thing to do is.

Don't give up. I lapsed many times and got off it again so it is 100% possible.

If you wish to write in again or let me know how you are getting on then do feel free. I wish you all the best and don't lose faith. Caroline.