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Addiction to Drugs/herion withdrawl

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Expert: - 1/16/2010


Question
Daniel,
I'm ready to stop this horriable drug.I'm scared of the withdrawl. I wanted to know if there was anything I could take to help me sleep at night. I can't stand it when my legs start moving around every second. What else could I do to get started ? I have enrolled in a program for suboxone. But that is going to take 7 to 10 days. The first appointment is for labs only. So I know its going to suck. I just want to feel normal again.
Thanks

Answer
Tricia,

I'm sorry for the delay- your question fell through the cracks- my bad.

I sure know how you feel right now- I've been there so many times. Thank you for your question as it reminds me to be grateful for my recovery. Tricia here's the important thing for you to take to heart- your going to have to pay the piper- sooner or later. There's no easy way out and there's no feeling comfortable or normal until the poison has cleared your system and your addicted body stops craving it. Tricia I have kicked fentanyl/synthetic heroin (I smoked it), IV heroin, oxycontin, hydrocodone, demerol so many freaking times it's ridiculous. The worst kick I ever had? It was suboxone. I fucking hate that poison. I'm sorry to tell you this as I know it seems like a wonderful solution, the clinic's have these smooth marketing claims and the knowledable, caring doctor promises to make it all ok. It's straight bullshit. Suboxone, subotex, there straight opiates. Chemically synthesized which in my opinion makes them worse than the somewhat natural heroin. There are people on sub. for life. Go to the suboxone message boards and read the posts from folks that have been on it for years, after unsuccessfully trying to wean and "jump" off as they call it.So sad when most of these people had really light addictions to start with and even if it was a bad one- one week of hard withdrawal was all they needed to purge the system. At first it seems like a miracle. No more street drugs and street life or whatever, no more withdrawals, no more stealing or whatever you did for cash and at first you do feel normal and clean- but your not. Your putting a hardcore drug in your system, a weird one at that. My personality totally changed on that shit. After being on it for 9 months at the end- only 2 mgs! I went to the desert and camped. I had the runs for 11 straight days and incredible withdrawal. I was weak and had trouble sleeping for a month. Now, if you do go ahead with the sub. DO NOT TAKE IT FOR MORE THAN A WEEK!Once it your body acclimates to it- your screwed. Do a detox- decling amounts for one week or less. DO NOT DO A "MAINTENANCE" SCHEDULE! DON"T START WITH THE INCREDIBLE LARGE DOSE OF 8 mgs. YOU DON"T NEED THAT MUCH- NO ONE DOES- NOT EVEN THE MOST STRUNG OUT JUNKIE.  Or better yet, don't do it at all. I sure as hell wouldn't. Like I said- your going to have to resign yourself to paying the piper. You can totally do it. I've tried so many different ways Tricia. For me, the easiest way is to do it in a detox center. When I'm on my own I focus exclusively on myself and that makes it harder. In a detox "rehab" there's always other people with worse habits and plenty of recovering addicts willing to offer support if you ask. Tell yourself over and over "I never have to go through this again." It will suck- but there's a light at the end. It will pass! I promise you. Most likely on your fourth day you will start to feel better- unless you put opiate "helpers" in your system. Then you just prolong the irritating, frustrating withdrawal. This is not too much for you to handle- it's not. You may e-mail me directly at daniel@cuesu.org
Best wishes,
Daniel

Addiction to Drugs

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Daniel A. Toth

Expertise

Any questions related to: drug abuse,recovery and opiate withdrawal. Friends and family questions are also welcomed- however there's very little I can suggest if the person has no willingness to change.I will only answer NON- PRIVATE questions as my objective is to help as many people as possible- use a fake name. PLEASE DO NOT SUBMIT QUESTIONS REGARDING DRUG TESTS OR HOW LONG YOUR DOPE WILL STAY IN YOUR SYSTEM! My energy is directed at those wishing to stop self destructing.

Experience

Fourteen years active addiction;Eleven years to cocaine and heroin.
I've used every drug I've known about except PCP Any comments are from personal experiance, and do not necesarily reflect any programs.
SEE UPDATE AT THE BOTTOM OF THIS STORY! This was for an article in a teen magazine hence the youth perspective: I was a good kid. A diligent student with a 3.5 GPA through 9th grade. Now I was somewhat shy and didn't have a lot of friends. I discovered that by smoking weed I had instant friends. It was great at the time. All of a sudden I knew all these people, was getting invited to parties- hanging out after school getting high. Pretty soon getting high at lunch and even before school and then ditching school all together. In the beginning it was the social activity, not the "high" that was the major attraction. I just knew I would stop smoking it soon, perhaps after I got a cool girlfriend. Well then I started really enjoying the high- Having a bad day? Forget about in and get stoned. The parents getting on my case? Forget about it and get stoned. This girl I really like doesn't know I exist, better just get stoned. I found a way to great way to cope with all my problems. Well my grades started dropping, my hobbies such as all ocean activities and sports where only done high and then slowly not at all. Nothing was "cool" or important except getting high. With or without my friends. Then I was introduced to Meth or "crystal" Would I have considered it if not for my weed habit? Of course not. Plus I am just going to try it this one time. Wow! Now I could easily talk to girls. In fact I could talk and talk for hours to anyone about anything. And you know I'm one cool, smooth dude. Man I feel good. Then after it wore off I would struggle with depression and smoke a lot of weed until I got more meth. Now high school was over. I had no ambition for college but I did work in the family business. I still could hold a job with these habits. Now a friend tells me about this drug (heroin) that is just like pot except there’s no "burn out" He doesn't address it as heroin but a harmless sounding slang name. I observe him and his friends smoking this brown powder for months. They seem to be having a good time. They don't die. In fact there having more fun than I am. I wanted to try it. Just once, too see what it feels like. I would never try it again. Again it was the new friends at first and then the drug that became the major attraction. But it was o.k. because I'm going to never smoke it again after this next time. Oops, I did it again. O.K. but next week I'm going to quit for sure! Now the heroin made me feel nice, but the cocaine smoking was awesome. Plus no crash because I'll just smoke a little heroin. Before too long I was injecting a cocaine and heroin solution (speedball) into my veins as often as I could. Working did not accommodate my lifestyle. How could I work anyway in heroin withdrawal? I had to get some dope! Let’s see, my family has disowned me, I've sold everything I ever had. I've robbed every friend or family member than I had contact with. What am I going to do? Some how I got my fix every day. Not once but three or four times average. But it was still o.k. because I'm going to quit, maybe even tomorrow after I get high. I went for years thinking this way. I've been arrested many times. I even admitted myself many times to detox to get over the addiction but found myself planning my next high before I even left. I just couldn't cope with life. I didn't know how. But that won't matter, as soon as I get my fix everything will be alright. And it was..., for a little while. At this point I had long stopped kidding myself. I knew I was a hopeless addict. In fact three of my close friends overdosed and died. Another got sent to prison for years, and none of these guys did anything I didn't do. I knew I was on a dead end course to jails, institutions or death. I would put myself into one recovery home after another only to leave to get high. Why? I wasn't ready to admit I was completely powerless over my addiction and my life had become unmanageable. Only after I completely surrendered was I ready to listen to suggestions from the wonderful people in Narcotics Anonymous. (twelve step program) Today I enjoy many blessings of recovery. I have a wonderful family that loves and trusts me. I work every day, pay bills, support myself and even help others where I can. I love to travel and do as I can afford to. I still have problems but today I don't escape with artificial substances. I have learned coping skills, and realize that life isn't always wonderful but it could be a heck of a lot worse. I don't want to wake up one day an old man, and wonder what I could have been. I'm going to find out! You see, I'm one of the lucky ones and am extremely grateful for that. UPDATE 5/24/2005: Relapsed with painkillers about one year ago, and have been struggling since. I have about 30 days clean as of today 5/24. It's no big mystery/shocker. I stopped doing what I needed to do (program) and made a stupid decision. A couple vicodins woke up the dragon. I'll be ok if I do what I did to get the five yrs. Good luck to all of us! 2/14/06 Doing really well today (one day at a time). I also went through and am still very much going through the most difficult thing I ever have without using any drugs. Not hiding from emotional pain today by artificial means but rather accepting my emotions as natural and moving forward. I'm focusing today on not denying my emotions but acting constructively despite. I realize today that any artificial numbing may help in escaping short term pain but then complete facilitate suffering. Today I recognize my self destructive habits.

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