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About Alice Allen, Rev (ULC)
Expertise
Adoption Reunion and Reconciliation - Why? Do I matter to you? Are you safe and well? To those reaching out, these are urgent questions. I offer search guidance, information about typical/atypical consequences of reunion, and counseling to all involved parties. Please 'View Profile' for more detail.

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I am an Universalist minister and counselor specializing in search, reunion, and reconciliation issues. I am founder of GrannysCupboard, an ULC ministry. As a function of our ministry, GrannysCupboard assists individuals searching for missing or estranged family and community members. Confidential information provided to GrannysCupboard is not shared without explicit permission. All costs associated with search service are paid by GrannysCupboard.

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You are here:  Experts > Parenting/Family > Adoption > Adoption Issues > interesting situation

Topic: Adoption Issues



Expert: Alice Allen, Rev (ULC)
Date: 2/5/2008
Subject: interesting situation

Question
My birthmom and I share a good friendship, since our reunion. I am also in occasional contact with my 2 half-brothers. My situation is that my birthmom's husband (not my biological father)is dying of cancer and they would like to know how to list me in the obituary. I do not consider them my mom and step-dad, so daughter or step-daughter is not appropriate. Do you have any suggestions as to the way I should be listed? I am not close to her husband, but I do appreciate being thought about and cared about enough to want to include me.

Thank you.

Answer
Hello, Donja. Yes, yours is an interesting situation. Thank you for writing.

As it seems important to your birthmom, please DO allow yourself to be included in her husband's obituary. You are his step-daughter, whether or not you were raised in the home.

Thank you for your question, Donja. I hope I've been some help.

Peace,
Alice

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