About Abi Expertise I can answer questions on the emotional side of being an adoptee and on searching for adopted persons & birth parents.
Experience I was adopted from birth myself, and have found my own birth parents (both in UK and Spain) having had very little information to go on. I have also had a lot of experience researching information for others.
Expert: Abi Date: 11/15/2004 Subject: adoption and family formation
Question Dear Abi,
I am writing a research paper about adoption and developing a family identity. I myslef am also adopted, so this is a very interesting topic to me, because i strongly believe that it is our nuture NOT nature that creates strong family bonds. I've been asking these questions to some other students who are adopted and i was hoping that you could answer the same questions for me too. Thank you so much for your time!
Sincerely,
Maggie Welch
1. At what age were you adopted?
2. Where were you born? where do you live now?
3. do you live in a transracial family?
4. Do you have any siblings? if so are they adopted too? are they your
biological siblings? what is the story of their adoption? at what age were
they adopted? what are your feelings towards them; have you ever felt like
they wern't your REAL siblings?
5. What is the story behind your adoption?
-do you know anything about your birth parents?
-did you live with a foster family? more then one? what do you
know/remeber about them? what role did they play in your development of family
identity?
6. Do you remember when you were first told that you were adopted? how did your
parents tell you? did being adopted ever confuse your sense of family identity?
7. When other people find out that you are adopted how do they react? are they
shocked? do they find it difficult to understand how you feel towards your
family? do they expect you to feel out of place? do many people know that you
are adopted?
8. was it ever difficult for you to transition into your family? what were your
experiences/memories?
9. Do you have an open adoption?
10. What is your relationship with your birth parents? what do you know about
them? have you met them? do you think about them often? do you wnat to meet
them?
11. what would you want to ask them about/tell them if you could meet them?
12. Do you feel like you fit in well with your family? what are some
characteristics that you share with your adoptive family (parents, siblings,
cousins, etc)?
13. If you konw anything about your birth parents, do you share any
characteristics with them either?
14. how has being in an adoptive family effect the way other people view your
family? has it effected it at all?
15. How has being adopted effected the way YOU view your family?
16. ANY OTHER COOL STORIES that you'd like to share with me...my paper is
about DEVELOPING family identity in adoptive families, so any other comments
that you think wouuld be useful, would be greatly appriciated!
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ALL YOUR TIME!
Answer 1) 6 weeks
2) London, Bristol now
3) no
4)Have one non-bio brother who wasn't adopted
5) Mother was unmarried in 1970s and had little family or financial support. It was an accidental pregnancy and she was not seeing my natural father any more either, hence I was put up for adoption. I only knew my mother's name and age and a little bit about her character/family life/work based on records from the adoption agency.
6) I was told from day 1.
7) Cant say I have had any strong reactions or questions. I have told everyone.
8) n/a
9) dont know what this means
10) I get along with birth parents ok - I found them when I was in my early 20's/early 30's. I see/speak to them every so often
12) I have always felt a bit different, but we obviously share past experiences growing up
13)I think so
14) no
15)yes - I love my own incredibly so
16) I believe nurture is more influential to a person's character than nature based on my experience
