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About Alice Allen, Rev (ULC)
Expertise
Adoption Reunion and Reconciliation - Why? Do I matter to you? Are you safe and well? To those reaching out, these are urgent questions. I offer search guidance, information about typical/atypical consequences of reunion, and counseling to all involved parties. Please 'View Profile' for more detail.

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I am an Universalist minister and counselor specializing in search, reunion, and reconciliation issues. I am founder of GrannysCupboard, an ULC ministry. As a function of our ministry, GrannysCupboard assists individuals searching for missing or estranged family and community members. Confidential information provided to GrannysCupboard is not shared without explicit permission. All costs associated with search service are paid by GrannysCupboard.

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You are here:  Experts > Parenting/Family > Adoption > Adoption Issues > My brother.

Topic: Adoption Issues



Expert: Alice Allen, Rev (ULC)
Date: 11/18/2007
Subject: My brother.

Question
Hi, My name is Ally. I'm 16. My mom had my brother 2 years before i was born, he's 18. He has a different dad then me. But he just turned 18 this past October and i thought that maybe now it would be easier to find him. I'm having a really hard time finding him though. It was a private adoption through my moms church at the time. I really would just like to talk to him maybe meet him if he still lives in FL. I would like to at least talk to him though and know who he is. Do you have any suggestions on how i could find him i really don't know how to go about this. Thank you.

Answer
Hello, Ally! I am glad to provide some general direction.

Lots of adult adoptees post their searches for family with online registries. Have you tried checking those? It is possible he already has a message waiting for his natural mother (your Mom). The SOAR site is a good place to start: http://www.geocities.com/Heartland/Oaks/3847/

Have you asked your Mom for all the information she recalls? She may have details that could lead you in the right direction.

By the way, Ally, you would not want to surprise your Mother and family with your "find" if they are not expecting it. I am quite sure you have the best of intentions, however, please trust me on this point.

Also, I would like to recommend some online reading. I hope you will check out this page at adoption.com: http://birthfamily.adoption.com/birth-parents/siblings.html

The site has tons of good information... And this forum might interest you: http://forums.adoption.com/search-birthfamily-adoptee/260058-searching-siblings-...

Ally, I hope I've been some help. Please let me know if you think I can help further. And, thank you for your question.


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