AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Question My girlfriend and I have been talking about swinging for a few months and
we would like to try it - in fact, we're very excited about it.
We are both straight. The way we imagine an ideal situation is having a
couple as friends, and once in a while swap partners and go have sex in
different apartments. We would prefer not to play in the same room,
because we'd rather not watch each other sexually interact with other
people.
We tried to contact a few couples through online sites, and we even met
some with whom we seemed to click - all until we told them about our
preference for separate room swinging. Nobody is interested in
that! The usual preferred progression seems to be from same room sex (no
swap) to soft swap to full swap, all same room.
Is there something intrinsically wrong with the way we think of swinging?
Or should we just be patient and keep trying to look for like-minded
couples? Do you have any suggestions about how to find them, and when to
break the subject of separate rooms with them? In your experience, are
there enough swingers out there who prefer it our way?
Answer Chris,
There is NOTHING wrong with you. Everyone has different tastes. What I would suggest is to establish a profile on several different sites. In that profile state early under the "What we're looking for" heading that you two prefer separate rooms. Another option a married couple I know do, is post as singles with separate profiles, this is due to difficulty coordinating sitter, off time from work, etc.
Since I do not know what part of the country you are in I can only recommend a couple of general websites to post profiles on: clubforeplay.com (tell them 2Tall4Fun referred you), club-swing.com (again let them know that you were referred by 2Tall4Fun), swappernet.com and of course adultfriendfinder.com.
You also might try a local swing club, this way you can meet folks in person. Check out NASCA's listings for your state & local area.
Whatever you do be patient, it takes a lot of searching to find like-minded couples no matter what your interests are. Just because you have similar interests doesn't mean the chemistry will be there for everyone involved . . . Yes, Chris there are LOTS of swingers out there & I am certain you will find ones who you will mesh with, just keep looking.
Hope this helps, let me know if you have any further questions.