Adult Swinging/finding what we want

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Expert: Analisa - 6/12/2008


Question
My husband & I have recently found out about a local on site swing club. We are pretty excited to find out that there is this great opportunity to explore our fantasy's discretely and safely. I am the more sexually adventurous between us and I have always been very bi curious and hubby gets just as aroused as me about this fantasy. We have discussed in length what our rules are for visiting this club. MFF only or MF & MF with no other man for me. I have very little jealousy and I find it very erotic to think of sharing my husband with another woman but since I have no fantasies about being with other men that rule is just fine with me. So we have gotten the basics down for our first visit but now we are wondering how to go about finding a female or a couple interested in swinging within our boundaries. At one of these clubs how does one know what others are 'into' without turning it into a survey?

Answer
Robin,

I would make one more suggestion about your first visit . . . don't expect ANYTHING to actually happen. This prevents disappointment later.

At on premise clubs it is very difficult to discover other's likes or dislikes without just coming out & asking.

I would also suggest that you two adopt a "soft-swap" only approach until you find a like minded couple.

Hope this helps,
Analisa

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Analisa

Expertise

Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed, What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e. Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.

Experience

Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)

Organizations
NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P

Education/Credentials
Both of us are college educated professionals.

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