AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Expert: Analisa Date: 6/21/2008 Subject: My wife having sex with another man
Question QUESTION: We are a young couple and me and my wife are planning to go to a swinger's party. My wife seems pretty excited by the idea, though at first she hesitated in telling me and said she would no way be with a guy. But later when i asked her if she would like it if another man plays with her, she got very excited and now she doesnt want to miss it.
I would like to see her reaction and maoning when a guy enters her. She said she would like a longer dick than mine.
My questions:
1. I would feel bad if i am not able to give her as good pleasure as the guy with the longer dick? Though my dick size is also about 4.5 - 5 inches, she feels a longer one would satisfy her more. Should i go ahead with it ( I want to but am scared)
2. I see from these sites that a man wanting to see his wife getting pleasure from another man is quite common - I just want to know why is that, whats the philosophy behind that and is it normal?
3. I also may consider a man entering my backside (though i havent done it before), but i cant do it infront of her, should i ask her about this?
I will be most happy and thankful to get your reply urgently as the party is just 3 days from now.
Thanking you
ANSWER: Janice,
BEFORE you go to this party, you & your wife need to talk . . . about EVERYTHING; Your fears, your frustration, your desire to have sex with another man. Get answers to ALL of your questions BEFORE you two head to this party. Be very honest with her and ask for the same in return.
As far as your feelings being "normal"? Who defines what "normal" is? Normal for me maybe abnormal for someone else. I think it is odd to put concrete statues all over my yard or to put knick-knacks on every level surface in my house. But there are thousands of people who find this "normal". I find it insane to spend time subjecting my skin to potentially cancer causing substances but there are millions of people who lay out in the sun & go to tanning beds. So who is "normal"? I checked with merriam-webster online dictionary as I was answering this question, there are 6 different definitions of the word - normal. My personal two favorites are:
#3: occurring naturally <normal immunity>
#4 a: of, relating to, or characterized by average intelligence or development b: free from mental disorder : sane
Hope this helps & let me know if you need further assistance.
Good Luck with that talk,
Analisa
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: Firtly, Thank you for such a propmt reply.
Ya you are right about talking it with her, I have been thinking of creating a questionaire for her and myself.:)
Anyway 2 more things:
1. Is it possible that she is after a long dick ( i measure mine again and its about 7 inches) enters her she wont find me satisfying.. What i mean is that is it natural for a woman to not find it satisfying after only doing it once?
2. How long a dick normally is a good size (just so that i dont get an inferiority complex)
Lastly, Q.2 from the earlier questions: What is the psyche behind men wanting to see their wives with another man?
ANSWER: Answer to #1 - Yes, it is absolutely possible but then anything is possible. I can't say she would be the best person to ask.
Answer to #2 - Please refer to the definitions of normal previously sent. Normal is by each persons definition different (that is why I pointed out there are SIX different definitions to the word 'normal'.
Answer to Q2 - I am not qualified to answer questions of psyche. All I can say is in my personal experience, my husband finds it "hot". He says its like watching the hottest porn ever & going home & having sex with the star.
Lastly, I would strongly recommend that both of you create a questionnaire for the other rather than one person for both of you.
Good Luck,
Analisa
---------- FOLLOW-UP ----------
QUESTION: This may be a bit harrassing but I'm sorry i just need to know:
1. My earlier question no.1 in a different context: What about you, will you feel dissatified even if u have been inserted once with a longer dick than your husbands (ie if u like longer ones)
Thankyou for answering these questions and making me a bit more comfortable
Answer How I feel has little or no consideration in how your wife will feel, that is why I did not go down that particular rabbit hole. I would suggest you talk to YOUR wife and explain YOUR concerns.
Personally, how a man is equipped has ABSOLUTELY no bearing on how I feel about MY husband.
