Expert: Leesa - 1/15/2009

Question
G'morning,
I am a single male who was known about the lifestyle (and somewhat active, when the right couple comes along) for about 15 years.  I am 38.

My question is this:

You own & operate a club, which might put you closer to the 'front row seat' answer.  Do people in this lifestyle have STD's?  And if so, which diseases are most passed between swinging partners?
In my experience, nobody uses a condom for oral to genital.
And it seems that about 1/4 of the people (maybe more?), use no condom for genital to genital sex.

How is it that Herpes 2 and Chlamydia and Gonorrhea arent running rampid thru the lifestyle community? It only takes one person to get it, then multiply that by the number of people who share an experience with those people, etc etc!!!

Or, is it possible that all of swingers arent being honest with each other?

I went for a 7 check point test this week...waiting for results.  I have never done the full deed without a condom but have allowed myself to enjoy oral without a condom...thats why i am worried :(  

Answer
Hi there and thanks for your question.
In my 17 years of being on the scene i have never been told or known of any persons with any STD's. Of course that doesn't mean it happen, but we are just not aware of it.
Just like in the world "out there" everyone is responsible for thier own safety.
You saying people dont use condoms for swinging , is such a huge comment to make.
Everyone we know and see uses condoms for all activities.
There is no difference to us having sex with others, and "normal" lol , people having sex with others. Dont stereo type swingers as a seperate group of people. We in the lifestyle are no different to any one out there having sex. It is about choices and we all practice safe sex in our own ways, and are all comfortable in the way we do it.
To say swingers dont have safe sex, or safe oral is a silly thing to say indeed.
Everyone that walks and breathes at some stage in their lives will probably have sex, we are no different to those people.
Infact at a swingers club you are probably safer as we provide free condoms everywhere and it is a rule when entering our venue that condoms are used at all times.
I have grown children and they go to nightclubs, i am aware of hundreds of instances where kids, probably if you have some like yours and mine, going to the toilets and having unprotected sex in the heat of the moment, i think we should be concentrating on those instances, more than grown responsible adults who practice safe sex in their own homes or in a club environment where condoms are freely available. I know that a lot of patrons that attend our club are constantlly screened for STD's for their own peace of mind, and those are the ones that do practice VERY safe sex, but i can assure you the teenagers etc, that have sex in toilets at clubs, sre not doing the same thing. Food for thought hey?
Make condoms available everywhere for free and that should stop a lot of the problems you talk about.
Hope that helps
Leesa