Expert: Leesa - 2/10/2009

Question
iam very much in love with my wife and she is in love me. our sex life is great. She claims if i don't make her orgasm within 2 minutes - I am not trying. This is not a problem(she is easy to please or just i like trying everytime). However we have been married for 14 years and in our late 40s and I think it is time to push our limits. we both had plenty of sex with other partners. She is just now telling me about her one night stands ( i think she has had only 4 and 3 long term loves - it doesn't matter all I want is to really please her and see her pleased. I am thinking of sharing my wife with another Man who we can trust and be open with and who has a lot bigger penis (my wife has always dated men over six foot tall with 9 inch + penis - me 5foot 7 with only 6 inch - she does tease me about my size. This makes me work harder to keep her happy (perfect). This 6foot man and his wife often dance and drink with us. They are very open with us and we know he doesn't get sex often (business/ money issues). I trust him and feel close to him ( we often give each other a hug good by and give each wife hugs and kisses)

talking to my wife - she thinks i couldn't please the man's wife and it wouldn't take him long to come. She is not talking about group sex just making a comment

Iam thinking of us pleasing my wife to the point where she let's go and just enjoys the ride.  

Question - my wife has been through some hard emotional times would this enlighten her be to much for her or could it lead to closer stronger relationship?

Note Our friends are in touch with their inner selves, they have notice my wife disconnection - they belive natural healing - we have done the counselor thing. My wife says she Ok. Me I am thinking about having sex with him and letting my wife and his wife watch and enjoy each other.

Answer
Hi there
I am a tad confused at your question.
In one breath you say your are deeply in love with your wife and the sex is fantastic and in the next breathe you say that she makes fun of your penis size and that you could not please another woman.

then: You mentioned something in your last sentence about having sex with the other man yourself.?

Quote: Question - my wife has been through some hard emotional times would this enlighten her be to much for her or could it lead to closer stronger relationship?

Note Our friends are in touch with their inner selves, they have notice my wife disconnection - they belive natural healing - we have done the counselor thing. My wife says she Ok. Me I am thinking about having sex with him and letting my wife and his wife watch and enjoy each other.
End Quote:

My advice to you is never to go into the swinging scene to try and fix something, it wont work .
Swingers are self assured and very much in love and have no hang ups with themselves or their partners.
the lifestyle is to enhance not to FIX>
So No.....dont play with others, until you and your wife have worked through any problems you have and are very comfortable and content with each other and trust each other completely.
Never enter swinging to try to make something that is in need of attention better, as you will just make it worse.
Sorry to be the bearer of bad news.
Leesa
Keep up the talking and communication and one day you will both fall into the right frame of mind to be able to take this journey for the right reasons....to enhance your love life and full fill your love for eachother. Not to see if you can fix some issues.