AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Question Hello there. I am 27 years old and my boyfriend is 26. We have been together for 4 years, living together for almost all of that time. We own a house, have started and had to close a business, and share the same values for family life such as raising children and financial issues. Lately I have been feeling a strong desire to start having intimate relationships with other people. Our sex life is just so-so together, and I would just like to experience more people. We have talked about this before a year or so ago when it was brought up on a TV show. He didn't seem to be into it as much as I was, but there was some interest...I am thinking of bringing it up again, but more seriously this time. What would be the best way to start such a conversation? Also, I would really like to just be able to do my own thing and him his own thing and then do our thing together. I'm not sure I want to have a threesome or group thing with him. I feel no desire to end the relationship, but just want to expand my sexual horizon. How can I explain this to him?
Answer Noralee,
I will do my best to answer this but this really has nothing to do with swinging, this is more of a relationship question.
We have found that honesty is the best way to make a relationship work. Try being honest with him and telling him what you just told me. Let him know what you want to do. That you want to explore your sexuality, maybe he will want to be a part of this with you and share it with you. That is what a relationship is all about.
He doesn't necessarily have to actively participate, maybe he only wants to watch?
We STRONGLY suggest being HONEST and OPEN with this person you share this relationship with.
BTW - We did notice you didn't mention love or passion towards him in this, not a judgement just an observation.
