AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Question My husband and I have gone to a swinginger's club and hedI in Jamaiaca. I thought both were sleazy and could not go through with any thing. This upset my husband and caused trouble even though before either he had said it was just to check it out and we did not have to join. We ended up in counseling. He told me it was over and he would never bring it up again. Lately he has been going to swinging sites and looking up swinging vacations. He has brought up Hedo III for a "nude vacation". What am I missing. Help me. I am concerned.
Answer Kathy,
Even though this question isn't really about swinging per se but, actually about your husband's behavior, I will do my best to answer this.
Q: What am I missing?
A: The answer is unfortunately more questions . . . Questions you need to ask him . . . I suggest that the two of you sit down together and talk this out. Let him know you are not blaming, accusing or threatening but, you are curious. What is going on for him? What is the draw or attraction? Was he just embarrassed into saying it was over? Since he knows you aren't interested is he planning to go alone? Because swinging doesn't work if BOTH of you are not committed to it.
My questions for you to think about (and you do not need to respond to this) is why did you go to the club and Hedo in the first place? What we you trying to accomplish? What did you think would happen? Try working out those answers before you have that sit down with him.
Hope this helps,
Analisa
BTW - I have been in the LifeStyle for quite sometime now and I think the Hedo resorts are sleazy too. There are many much classier options out there. One of the reasons Hedo is so sleazy is there are very few actual swingers there and a LOT of opportunistic people instead.
