AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Question My boyfriend and I spent an unexpected night swinging with another couple that we are close friends with. It was not planned, everyone enjoyed it until the end. Everyone was treated equally and everyone participated. Now the other girl won't talk to me, her boyfriend is all about another encounter and my boyfriend is having guilt issues and I feel like I'm in the middle feeling bad only because some others are not able to deal with it. My boyfriend never wants to do it again, I am totally fine with his choice and I really have no drive to do it again because of the negative experience. How can I help them deal with this, or get over the guilt, or is there really nothing I can do?
Answer Dear JH,
Your main concern should be your main relationship. How does your boyfriend feel? What does he want to do? All the rest . . . let them sort their own stuff out and leave it ALONE!
In the swinging Lifestyle too many people forget that their primary relationship is SUPPOSED to be the most important one and forget to treat it that way. Focus on your boyfriend and your relationship with him. Unless of course you do not want this relationship to continue.
