AboutAnalisa Expertise Questions related to Swinging i.e. Why did you choose to become a swinger, He/She wants
to but I have doubts, How to begin/get started, What is the purpose of swinging, Why
would you become a swinger, Should we/shouldn't we, Rules (Are/Aren't they needed,
What should they be, What should be non-negotiable, What can be compromised, What to
do if rules are ignored or broken), House vs. private parties, Resources to locate other
swingers, What does it mean to take one for the team
Questions we can't answer: Any alternative sexual questions other than swinging, i.e.
Bestiality, Gang Banging, anything to do with minors, B/D or S&M, toilet games, etc. We also don't feel proficient in answering in depth relationship questions, we are not marriage/relationship counselors, if we receive a question that falls into that category we will refer you to seek professional help.
Experience Over 10 years in the Lifestyle, numerous events & encounters (some pleasant & enjoyable and others that were less than)
Organizations NASCA, Good Vibrations, C4P
Education/Credentials Both of us are college educated professionals.
Question Hello! Thank you for your site - it's incredibly helpful. My boyfriend and I have talked about being with another couple or with another female for a while and yesterday we randomly met a woman who asked us if we would like to swing with her and her husband. We have not met him yet.
We would like to meet the couple to find out more and to see if we both are interested or if we are just interested in her (if she is interested), etc.
Can you give us some simple tips and/or questions, topics we can ask the couple. It sounds like this would be their first time swinging as well, so I'm interested to learn some of things we both should be thinking about. Is it appropriate to ask if they have been tested for STDs recently? Do you think it best to meet at another place besides our home for the encounter, such as a hotel?
I appreciate your advise.
- Sarah
Answer Sarah,
Yes, it would be best to meet someplace neutral like a restaurant, bar or hotel.
Yes, it is appropriate to ask about STDs. It is also appropriate to ask about condom requirements or any other safe sex practices they may have.
I would also suggest the two of you decide beforehand on some basic ground rules (i.e. soft swap, girl/girl only, same room only, anal or no anal, kissing or no kissing, etc.).
Other questions:
1. Ask what their ground rules are.
2. Are they into "other" play (i.e. bondage, pain, potty games, etc.)
3. Smokers/non-smokers
4. Any other questions you might think of.
I would also recommend that the two of you join the website that I have posted in several previous answers. This way you can get to know other swingers in your area.