About Jeff & Kris Booth Expertise Singles and swinging, how to get started, what to expect, dealing with jealousy, finding clubs, throwing parties.
Experience 7 years in swinging, involved with planning and presentations for several Lifestyles Conventions, author of Guide to Alternative Lifestyles, and in an article on sexuality.org, the author states we are reputed to hold the best swing parties on the West Coast.
Publications Loving Alternatives magazine, AVN Online magazine, editors of sexinreview.com, eroticguide.com, eroticuniversity.com, and we have been featured on Extra, Leeza, The X Show, Dr. Susan Block Show, KROQ Kevin and Bean show, Rouze.com, and Los Angeles magazine.
Expert: Jeff & Kris Booth Date: 8/17/2004 Subject: Friends with benefits taking a tough turn
Question My wife and I have swapped with a couple 4 times now and have enjoyed the experience. We've been good friends with this couple for 3 yrs now (wife and the other wife first). The problem is the other wife has consistantly started verbal fights with her husband shortly after we all finish having sex. Notably, she enjoys sex with me and has even mentioned a separate rendevous without her partner (I will not do this). She still wants sex with me but her jealousy seems to get in the way of a happy ending of our parties. So my question is what should be done? We all chat throughout the day. Communication is good. Last comment, open swing style relationships are not an option right now, looks like this will be it. We just landed on a new deal. Need help, your comments will be well received.
-marcus
Answer If you took out the sexual component of this relationship it would still be a troubled friendship. They clearly have issues in their relationship that need to be resolved, and swinging is probably not something that they should be doing now. It may likely only contribute to further deterioration of their relationship. You do them and yourself no favors by continuing to be sexually involved.
I have known of couples who had rocky starts with fits of jealousy and later straightened things out. We were right in the middle of it and it was no fun at all at the time.
If you want to continue the friendship, you need to explain to them that fighting in front of you is not acceptable and that they need to work some things out before things can continue. If the communication is good, as you say, and they probably already know they have a problem, then expressing how upsetting their fighting and jealousy is may be a good incentive to get them to working on resolving their conflicts.
